“No it didn’t, but that’s because of me. I was an idiot, I was foolish, I got scared about us being too close to one another too quickly... I freaked and I push people away, that’s what I do. It’s what I’ve always done.” My heart melts and my tone softens as I look at Serena. “The only difference is you’re the only person I miss. You’re the only person that I think about every single day.”
“You do?”
“I’ve texted you, every single day, haven’t I? I’ve proved to you that I’ve been thinking about you, haven’t I? I know that I’ve been foolish, I know I’ve acted badly, but I won’t anymore. You just have to give me a chance. To be with you, to be a father, to prove that I’m worthy?”
She pauses for a moment and thinks it through, I can almost see the cogs ticking in her brain. I bite down on my lip as I try my hardest to keep my persuasive words inside. All I want to do is outpour all my feelings to her but I know after everything she’s just been through that will overwhelm her. I need to just keep my feelings inside and let her work it out for herself. It might kill me, but I have to do it. I just need to keep reminding me that it’s the right thing to do.
“You really want to try?” she asks me curiously. “You really want to go through all of this again? With me, and the babies, and all the nightmare that’s going to come with that?”
The thought of it crushes me, but in a really good way. I want all of that so much, I want her, the commitment, the babies, the fatherhood. I want it more than anything in the world. “Yes, please, it would mean so much to me if you would just give me a try. I honestly couldn’t want anything more.”
She parts her lips, ready to give me her answer and I tense up while I wait for it. But unfortunately before she gets her answer out, before I find out whether or not she’s going to agree to my plan, the door swings open and my heart sinks. Jenny is back, she’s here to interrupt before I get my answer. I don’t blame Jenny, she deserves to see my babies too, but her timing is terrible.
“Hey, Ben, it’s me.”
Oh, it isn’t Jenny, it’s someone really shocking, someone that maybe I should have suspected would turn up after my message earlier. It might not be the best way for this to happen, but it’s here now, it’s upon us. It might have been forced upon us, but it’s here all the same. Best to just accept it.
I turn my head just to see her eyes shining, her face ecstatic and all of a sudden it feels perfectly right that she’s here. After all this moment wouldn’t happen without her. If Mom hadn’t kicked my ass, I would be in a gutter somewhere. Probably drunk and damn near death,
“Mom... you’re here. This is Serena, Serena, this is Mom.”
Chapter Twenty Six – Serena
“This... this is your Mom?” I sit up straighter in the bed, or as much as I can manage with my baby in my arms. “Here? Now?” I don’t want to be rude, but this is a massive shock.
“I’m sorry, I know you probably don’t want me here right now, but you have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this moment. I want to meet my grand children, is that okay?”
I glance at Ben who’s got a bright smile on his face. I guess this is his mother. “Do you want to hold little Rose here?” I ask while extending my arms to her. “I could use a little moment to collect myself anyway.”
“My name is Iris, by the way.” She takes Rose from me and hugs her to her chest, breathing in my daughter’s youthful smell. “It’s lovely to meet you, Serena. I’m sorry it’s taken so long. I kept asking Ben to introduce us so I could help you through the pregnancy but he wouldn’t. He kept saying that you both were fallen out, his fault I assume.”
I can’t help but laugh at her, she’s a wonderful woman. Already she seems so caring, so trusting, so loving of her son. I can already see that she would do anything for him, even if she didn’t like his actions... nothing like my judgemental parents. They were sickened by my choices, they hated every moment of me being there as a disappointment. It wouldn’t surprise me if they never came to see my babies.
But my baby brother has been my rock.
“Do you two mind standing close together so I can get a picture for my brother? He really wants to see the babies?”
They do as I ask and I grab my phone. Once the picture is taken I caption it with who it is and send it off to him. Moments later I get a reply.
‘Yay! So the asshole finally came to his senses and he’s there. His Mom looks nice too. I’ll come up and visit soon, I promise. Love you, E xxx’
I smile at his words, glad to finally have some good news for him. It’s been difficult up until now and he knows that much well. Now he can see that finally things are coming together and that maybe things might work out between me and Ben. And not just for the babies, but for me and Ben too.
‘I love you, Ethan. Thank you xxx’
“So Rose and Brandon, they are both such lovely names. How did you come up with them?”
“We did it together.” I smile at Ben, feeling all the emotions washing over me again. “I chose Brandon and Ben chose Rose.”
Iris looks between us as if she’s trying to work out what’s going on between us now, which is something I’m currently trying to figure out myself. Ben is offering me everything, the whole world, again it feels like I’m on a movie set and that my fairy tale is finally coming true, but if I do this, I need to do so in a much more cautious way. I need to be smart, wise, this isn’t just about me anymore. I have two children that are depending on me for everything.
“Well, I just have to say that I’m very glad to see you both in the same room again. I’m sure it’s been a very long time.” Iris looks at me gratefully. “I know it must have taken a
lot for you to call Ben when you went into labour after everything that you’ve been through, so it’s very nice that you did this.”
“Was it you who text me once?” I feel compelled to ask. “If so then I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ignore you, I just...”
“I know, you needed time.”