“Emma,” I said softly, once I was sure that I wasn’t going to lose myself to a fit of the giggles. “You know that isn’t very polite, right?”
"No," she said sulkily, her chin sinking even further down. "I don't. What's not polite about the truth?"
“Your aunt Sophie was nice enough to cook for you, so you shouldn’t complain. You know that dinner didn’t just appear out of nowhere, right? We aren’t living in a Disney movie.”
“I wish we were,” Emma said grouchily. “I bet things wouldn’t be so boring if we were.”
“Sure,” Sophie said brightly, digging into her own bowl of pasta happily. “Unless you’re in one of those Disney stories where you get yourself locked in a tower or put under a sleeping curse or something. I bet you’d be pretty freaking bored if either of those things happened.”
“Ugh, you know what I mean, Aunt Sophie. I can’t take it anymore! There’s like, nothing fun left to do in life!”
“Sweetie, what are you talking about?” I asked as gently as possible, trying not to piss her off and make her fly off the handle. “It’s only the first of July. How can there be nothing fun left? Especially in your whole life? There’s a lot of life left to live, Emma. It’s pretty early to give up on it all.”
"I'm not giving up,” she said. “I'm just bored!"
“So, then you’re ready to get back to school then, I suppose?”
“Yup!” she crowed happily. Sophie and I both dissolved into laughter after all. “I kind of am. I’ll get to see all of my friends, at least. And I sort of like school. There’s always something new to do, at least.”
"Seriously?" Sophie asked, her face registering genuine shock. "I don't see how that's possible. When your mom and I were young, we always wanted the summer to go on forever. Or at least, as close to forever as we could get. It's like we're not even the same species."
“You’re so silly.” Emma giggled, distracted enough to begin eating her dinner, despite it being the self-professed most boring food in the world. “And I bet part of why you weren’t bored was because you had boyfriends.”
“What?!” Sophie and I asked quickly and at the exact same time. “What does that even mean?”
“Boyfriends. You guys probably had boyfriends to hang out with you during the summer. That must make everything way more fun.”
"What on earth makes you think that?" I asked. My heart was thumping in my chest, and whether or not it was rational, I could feel the metallic taste of panic beginning to flood my mouth.
"If you have a boyfriend, you have somebody to always want to hang out with you,” Emma said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Plus, they like, do whatever you say and stuff. When they don't, you get to talk to your girlfriends about it. It makes it so there's always something to do. And even when you aren't actually doing anything, it makes it so that you have something to think about all the time. If I had a boyfriend, I bet this summer would be way, way better."
“Baby,” I reached across the table and took one of her little hands in my own. “I’m not sure it really works that way. In my experience, and I’m sure your Aunt Sophie’s as well, that’s not the way it goes.”
“Sure, it is,” Emma said. “That’s what it always looks like.”
“Looks like to who?” I asked. “Where?”
“In the movies and stuff. And with my friends.”
“You have friends who already have boyfriends?” Sophie asked, glancing over at me.
"Yup,” Emma said. “They don't like, do anything. Just maybe hold hands and stuff, and a whole lot of texts."
“That stuff can all be really great, but try to enjoy your life how it is now, too,” I said. “Sometimes, having a boyfriend can be really hard. It’s fun, but it can be hard also. There’s nothing wrong with being happy with how things are right now.”
“Is that why you don’t have a boyfriend, Mama? You think it’ll be too much work?”
Crap. Crap. I don't know why I hadn't seen the conversation going in this direction. Emma's question totally threw me off. To make matters worse, I could see that Sophie could tell that something was up with me. She didn't say anything, not yet, but that didn't mean much of anything.
Sophie was the most headstrong person I had ever known, and if there was something she wanted to know, she was going to know it. As I saw it, I now had two different options. I could keep quiet and wait for Sophie to pounce, grilling me into submission so that I spilled my guts everywhere. As options went, this didn't seem like a great one.
The second choice was that I just go ahead and tell Emma and Sophie about Drew. It was something I should have already done, seeing as the Fourth of July picnic was now only three days away. The longer I tried to put it off, the worse it was going to get, and I knew it. I took a deep breath, shut my eyes briefly, and then looked at Emma with what I hoped passed as a reasonable level of confidence.
“Actually, Emma, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that.”
“Have you now?” Sophie asked with shock so fake it was sickening, “What a complete and utter surprise!”
“Yes, actually, I have. I’ve been meaning to talk to both of you.”