What sort of job, exactly, is her boss asking her about?
I turn the phone on again. But I hesitate before I unlock it; this is an invasion of privacy. Yes, Georgia and I use each other’s phones all the time, and I know her password as well as she knows mine. But this is something she hasn’t spoken to me about. How would I feel if she snooped and found out my current problems with Polly, which I haven’t told her about yet?
But…
My heart is beating fast. I need to know. Why is her boss talking about moving?
What sort of job does he need an answer about?
I unlock the phone and find her messages before I can second guess myself. There aren’t many there; Georgia told me once that her boss didn’t really like texting too much. But there are a few messages since last week, the first with Georgia asking if she can have just a little more time to consider the job because of a family emergency.
That would be me, right? She sent that message on the Sunday after she found me drunk with Polly’s letter. She put some sort of decision off because of my problems, yet again. Her boss told her it was fine.
Then, three days later, he sends her an attachment.
The message underneath says, “These are the job details. And here’s the link to the application they want you to fill out, just in case.”
There’s a link underneath, already purple to indicate that Georgia has clicked on it and read through it.
I stare at it. If I open it, I’ll know what it’s all about. But I don’t know if I really want to know. It somehow feels like knowing will change everything.
But Georgia has put this off for me. She’s put her life on hold, again, because she felt that she needed to look after me. Hesitantly, I press on the attachment. It opens immediately, and I scan it quickly. It’s full of a lot of jargon that I don’t understand.
But I understand the location, which is New Jersey. I understand the talk about a maternity leave position. And I understand the words “Looking for an experienced employee to transfer to the main office – please recommend someone.”
Georgia has been put forward for a promotion at her work. The main branch of her newspaper wants her to go and work in the much larger office, where she will get bigger stories and meet more important people.
And she’s put this off? The message Georgia’s boss just sent spoke about moving. If Georgia took this job, she would definitely have to move; it would be too far to commute each day.
I feel sick. Has Georgia put off making a decision about this because of Lily and me?
This is Georgia’s life. She’s worked so hard at her job, and I love reading her articles; she’s good at what she does. Receiving a promotion like this is amazing. It would really make her career take off, which is exactly what she deserves.
Yet…I already know, as I stare at it, that all hope that she might take this job has disappeared with what has happened between us. There’s no way Georgia will consider taking this promotion now she’s finally gotten me right where she’s always wanted me; with her.
Yet she never said no. That means there’s a part of her that does want this job. Why wouldn’t she? This is huge!
This is hers.
I swallow the lump in my throat. I suddenly remember that Saturday night when I was drunk. Georgia had come in, calling that she wanted to talk to me about something. Was she going to tell me about the job? Maybe she had even decided to take it, right until the point that she found me moping about Polly.
Shit… What do I do?
I shouldn’t do anything, I know. This isn’t my business. But I also can’t ask Georgia to keep putting her life on hold for me. What’s between Georgia and I, right now, is very new, despite how long we’ve been best friends. We don’t know for certain that this new dynamic is going to work between us. What if we don’t work out? Then Georgia might end up regretting not taking the job.
Maybe we could try long distance? I snort. Georgia refused to leave me even when she thought I’d never love her back. There’s no way she’d move now that she knows that I do.
I don’t want to try and make decisions for her. But I don’t want to hold her back. I want her to live her life, get the promotions she deserves. She shouldn’t have to be tied so tightly to a little girl that isn’t hers and a father that’s still traumatized from a past relationship. That isn’t right.
I just wish I knew what to do now.
I look up. Georgia is still in the shower. I turn her phone off; she’s going to notice that those messages have been looked at when she finds them, and she’s going to know it was me. Maybe I should just confront her about it?
Then another message comes through, again from her boss.
I don’
t look at it this time. That message will cover up what I’ve done. I slip the phone back in to the pocket of the robe and sit back in my chair, running a rough hand through my hair.