I feel a flash of irrational jealousy, and stamp it down.
“Maybe, you’ll have to ask,” I say as evenly as possible.
But maybe I wasn’t quite quick enough to hide my insecurity. Lily’s arms suddenly wind around me and she presses her face to my stomach as she squeezes.
“You’ll always be the best at braids,” she says seriously.
I chuckle and ruffle her hair, already messy from bed.
“Thanks,” I say. “I’ll do your hair after breakfast, okay? We’ll make it really pretty and fancy.”
Lily cheers and I try not to feel too petty. There’s part of me that wants Polly to see how well I can look after our daughter on my own, and making sure she’s dressed nice and that her hair looks good is one way to do it.
“What do you want for breakfast?” I ask.
“Pancakes?” Lily asks hopefully. “Georgia made pancakes the other week.”
“Fine, but only because it’s a special day,” I say. “And when was this? I don’t remember getting pancakes for dinner.”
“You had that stomach bug, remember?” Lily says, skipping ahead of me into the kitchen. “You only got toast.”
“Oh, right, I remember that. Damn.”
“Is Georgia coming with us today?” Lily suddenly asks hopefully as I turn the kettle on and open the cupboard, surveying the ingredients.
“Not today,” I say.
“What about you?” Lily asks.
I glance at her. “Do you want me to come?”
Lily nods so fast I’m surprised it doesn’t hurt her neck. I grin.
“Well, you’re in luck, because it’s going to be me, you and your mom today,” I say.
“Yes!” Lily cheers, pumping the air. “This is going to be an amazing day!”
“I hope so,” I say softly.
I’m still not convinced that things aren’t going to go wrong. For Lily’s sake, however, I hope it all works out.
By the time two o’clock rolls around, Lily is a nervous wreck. She’s pacing a hole in the living room floor, her pink dress fluttering around her. Her hair is in a neat braid, a couple of flower clips wound into it. She’s nervous, though, which is beginning to make me feel anxious. As such, when the knock finally comes at the door, we both jump.
“Want to get it?” I offer.
Lily shakes her head quickly, gripping handfuls of her dress. I pat her hair carefully on my way past, not wanting to mess it up.
“It’s going to be okay, just relax,” I say.
I hear her inhale deeply several times as I walk to the front door. I’m not happy with how nervous Lily is; this is supposed to be something that makes her happy. I can understand, though; Polly is a stranger to Lily, and there’s probably a small part of her young mind wondering where Polly has been all her life.
Polly, on the doorstep, is equally nervous, though. She’s twisting the strap of her handbag, a different one, I notice, in her hands. Her skirt and blouse are both pressed neatly, and her hair is perfectly straight. Her red lips give me a thin, tremulous smile.
“Hello, Ethan,” she says.
“Hi, Polly,” I say. “Come in; you can meet Lily before I go.”
Polly pales slightly and nods. She steps inside as I open the door wider for her.