But was that enough? If things imploded with Gray and I again and we couldn’t find our way back, would that be enough?
Looking back at the house, I studied its grandeur. It’s beauty. It’s looming state on top of the hill that overlooked Napa Valley as a whole. I was no closer to any answers. No closer to coming up with any sort of a decision. But I did know what I wanted. I did know what I hoped for. And I was no longer afraid to admit what I was dreaming about at night.
I wanted a family with Gray. A life with him and our child. I envisioned family vacations, joint business ventures, and nights spent making love in a shared bedroom upstairs. I wanted that kind of life with him. Any kind of life with him. Even if he lost everything tomorrow and we had to move back to the likes of Williston or Stillsville just to make it, so long as I was with him it would be bearable.
And dare I say, even enjoyable.
Gray was what I wanted. Our family was what I wanted.
But simply because I wanted it didn’t mean it would work.
Chapter 27
Grayson
I gave Michelle the space she needed, but I didn’t stop planning what I had in store. And finally, the day had come. The only issue was I needed to get her out of the house so Maria and the other coordinators could get things underway. I hadn’t spoken with Michelle since she told me she needed space, so part of me wondered if this would even happen the way I was planning it to.
Waking up Sunday morning, I got myself dressed, then went to knock on her bedroom door.
“Michelle?”
I heard a grumble behind the door and I grinned.
“What?”
“I’ve got something planned for us today. Do you feel like going out?” I asked.
Another grumble caused my grin to slide into a smile, but I was shocked when the door swung open. There she stood, with her disheveled red hair and her eyes barely open. I committed everything about her to memory, knowing that this day would either solidify our future or potentially be the last time I ever saw her.
And she looked fucking incredible in her short little shorts and her tank top.
“It’s too early,” Michelle said. “Another hour?”
“We really should get moving if we’re going to enjoy our hot air balloon ride,” I said.
“Our what?”
“Come on. Get ready. I really think you’re going to enjoy today.”
I stood outside her bedroom door as she stumbled around to put clothes on. Every once in a while I heard her bump against something before she cursed and it made me shake my head. She really wasn’t a morning person at all, so I pushed off the wall to go make her some tea. She couldn’t have coffee, but hopefully the tea would perk her up a little bit. A squeeze of lemon and a trickle of sweet cream made it perfect, and I made it back to her room just as she came out.
The dress she had donned looked beautiful on her, and it gave me pause.
“What’s that?” she asked.
“Tea,” I said. “For you.”
“It’s not green tea, right? I can’t have that.”
“It’s actually ginger and mint. With a hint of lemon and a splash of sweet cream.”
“That actually sounds nice. Thank you,” she said.
“My pleasure. Now, let’s get going. We’re expected within the hour.”
“What’s this about a hot air balloon? Were you kidding?” she asked.
I offered her my arm and was surprised when she took it.