Hayley called me brooding earlier today at school when I basically threw my lunch tray at the mere presence of Madeline. Of course, no one knew I was throwing the little hissy fit because of her. But that was exactly why I acted the way that I did. Madeline. Seeing her, even a slight glimpse, made me feel things and think things that I didn't want to be thinking about.
She was that annoying little reminder that things were fucked up.
“Bro, are you good?” Ollie asked as Piper climbed off his lap and headed for the cabin.
I swallowed back the rage that was simmering below the surface. Why the fuck am I so pissed? “Fucking dandy. Just enjoying the show.”
“What show?” Christian asked, chuckling. “You mean the fire?”
I nodded, leaning back even further into my chair, trying to escape their nagging questions. “The girls.”
Ollie snickered. “You haven’t given a single girl a glance, my dude. What’s going on with you?”
Not this shit again.
The words rushed out. “My dad’s pissed at me. Things are just fucked up. I don’t want to talk about it. Family problems.”
His expression fell for a moment, one side of his face shadowed by the darkness, the other lit up by the fir
e. “Uh. Yeah. Christian and I know all about family problems.”
“Same,” Hayley piped up from sitting beside Christian.
“Pipe, too,” Ollie agreed, resting his elbows onto his knees, coming in a little closer to me. “You know we’ve got you, right?”
How the fuck could I explain years’ worth of shit to them, mostly relating to Madeline—Christian’s ex fucking girlfriend, main bully to his now current girlfriend—without fucking up everything else in my life?
Oh, hey. Yeah, so here’s the deal: Madeline and I were once something, but then she stopped talking to me and started dating Christian, and I was basically in love with her the entire time but had to act like I wasn’t, and then I found out my dad has been fucking her mom for years, and Madeline knew the whole goddamn time and didn’t say a single word. I also can’t stop thinking about her and fantasizing about what her mouth can do, but I also fucking hate her, too. How fucked is that? And my mom is depressed, and my dad won’t back the fuck off. I also have no money because he’s freezing me out. Good fucking times.
Even the thought exhausted me.
“I’m gonna head home. I’m not in the mood for a party.” I stood up from my chair, my fists clenching by my sides. “You guys will make sure no one breaks shit?” I asked, looking down at my friends who were all clearly fucking confused.
“Yeah, man. We got you. But seriously, are you okay?”
“Are you even okay to drive?” Hayley asked, fully sincere. “I can take you home. I haven’t had any alcohol.”
“I’ve had one beer. I’m fine.” And with that, I turned around and stomped my way to my car, pulling out of my party, not really giving a shit if people destroyed the cabin.
Once I got home, I ignored the texts lighting up my phone from a few people asking where I’d run off to and slowly made my way around the couch. Every light in the house was off, except for the small one above our stove in the kitchen. My mom was sleeping on the couch again, this time with her white shoes and blue scrubs still on. It was still weird seeing her working, given the fact that she hadn’t had a job since before she and my father got married. My father made more than enough money to support us, so my mom had been a stay-at-home mom my entire life—up until she found my dad fucking the neighbor. It pushed her into this independent version of herself that I’d never seen before.
My mom’s dark hair was splayed all over her face, and her arm was flung off the side of the cushion, dangling. I gently pulled the blanket up and tucked it around her body before glancing at her phone on the marble kitchen counter.
I made sure she was truly asleep before I stealthily walked over and pulled the screen open, typing in her password—my birthday, of course—and reading every last text from my father. I grunted with amusement at his name in her phone.
Asshole: I don’t understand why we can’t talk about this in person.
Mom: There is nothing to talk about.
Asshole: There is plenty to talk about. And what’s going on with Eric? He won’t return a single message of mine. I cut him off, thinking he’d come begging for money, and he hasn’t.
Mom: He’s hurt and confused. He found you having sex with his friend’s mother. Did you think he was going to forgive you, just like that?
Asshole: I think we all three need to sit down and talk.
Mom: There is nothing to talk about. Eric will forgive you in his own time. As for me? I’m in contact with a lawyer.
Asshole: This is ridiculous.