My hair was a blur of red in front of my face as I spun around in my chair. “I could ask you the same question.”
His gaze never left me, but it did narrow. “I do have someone in my corner.”
“Who? Did you finally tell Christian about your dad?” He had my full attention now, and just like that, my anger had vanished. I tucked my hair behind my ear and waited with hopeful eyes.
“Nah.” He smirked. “I’ve got you.”
An exasperated sigh left me. “Just because I’m the only person who knows your dad isn’t really your dad, doesn’t mean I’m in any way helping you, Ollie. I’m not in your corner.”
His jaw ticked before he asked, “Why do you think I’m here, Piper?”
“I don’t know. To check on me, which is pointless because I. Am. Fine.” My words came out sharp and fast, like knives being thrown at the wall. I could feel myself closing up again, becoming angry at myself for doing just that.
Part of me relished in the fact that Ollie was in my bedroom. That he cared enough about me to climb up a tree and jump onto my balcony to make sure I was okay.
But the other part of me was panicking that he saw me. The real me.
“You’re not fine. And neither am I. I’m here because I don’t want to be alone either, Piper. Do you know how fucking hard it is to go home to an empty house, knowing there are secrets buried all over the place? Do you know how much it kills me to wonder if I have another sibling out there? How much guilt it causes me to even have that thought? I have to bite my tongue every time I look at my father, knowing he likely knows that I’m not his son. And the worst part is that I want to know who my real dad is. What does that say about me?” Ollie was up on his feet now, pacing back and forth in my bedroom. “My life is good. I mean, yeah, I lost my mom, and that shit digs deeper than deep, but at least my dad is starting to come around. He asks about my grades, where I want to go to college; he’s making an effort to have dinner with Christian and me on the weekends. And here I am, wondering about my real dad. I should just be happy with what I’ve got.” He ran his hand through his hair and tugged on the ends. “I feel guilty. Confused.”
I stood up and rested my back along my desk, watching him unfold. “Why do you feel guilty, Ollie? You shouldn't feel guilty.”
He shot me a long glance, the edge of his jaw profound in the soft glow of my room. “Do your parents ask you those types of questions? Do they ask where you want to go to college? Do they care? Why are they okay with you being home alone all the time?” I went to stop him, but he continued on. “Do they know that you’re in line to become valedictorian?” How does he even know that? “Do they ask about Jason? Do they even ask about you?” He shook his head angrily. “My dad isn’t the best, but he’s better than your parents. That’s why I feel guilty. I should just be thankful I have him. I shouldn’t be digging into the past, but I can’t seem to stop.”
It was like a slap to the face with every question he asked, but seeing Ollie all worked up had me ignoring every single one. I felt selfish. I was so focused on my own shit with Jason and Tank that I forgot Ollie had his own shit, too. He was good at downplaying it, putting his focus on something else to hide, but Ollie needed someone.
“Hey,” I whispered, walking over and taking his wrists in my hands. He paused, his eyes latching onto mine. “Take a breath.”
“No,” he answered sharply. “I don’t like this. I don’t like feeling like shit is spiraling out of control. I don’t like seeing you sad. I don’t like knowing you’re alone all the time, and I hate that you push me away. You push everyone away. I see you, Piper. I’ve seen you for months.”
“I see you too, Ollie,” I whispered, gazing up into his eyes. I felt like he was sucking
my soul into his. We had a connection, and we’d had that connection since the Wellington Prep party. Sharing secrets connected you with someone. I saw that now. “You’re doing the same, Ollie. You’ve pushed everyone away so you don’t have to deal with your own stuff. You’re trying so hard to help me so you don’t help yourself.”
He turned away, but my nails dug into his wrists. “You’ve pushed everyone away, and I’ve done the same.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as his arms slowly relaxed in my grip. Our eyes locked again, and I could see the way his walls were crumbling. Just like mine. The more time I spent with Ollie, the weaker they grew. “Then maybe we should just stop.”
My voice was soft as I took a step closer to him, our body heat melding together. “Okay.”
His hands moved to my waist, my grip on his wrists never lessening. “Okay then,” he whispered. His lips slowly fell apart with the words, and I couldn’t take my eyes off them. A hot wave started from the top of my head and melted all the way down my body.
I watched his mouth move. “Let's make a deal.”
I blinked, hoping my eyes weren’t betraying me as I looked back to his. “What kind of deal?”
His grip on my waist tightened, and the feeling it gave me didn’t go unnoticed. “You fill Christian and Hayley in tomorrow and let us come up with a plan to get us both, and Jason, out from under this mess with Tank, and I’ll tell Christian what I've been hiding.” I began to nod my head. Sounds reasonable. “But I need you to do something for me first.”
Anything.
“What?”
His gaze was fiery. His pupils dilated as he took his hand off my waist, mine falling from his wrist with the motion. His touch was soft as he tipped my head back. “Tell me what happened in that trailer, because I’m going fucking crazy not knowing why you were crying.”
The words I’m fine were on the tip of my tongue, but I stopped myself and let myself cave. “My brother came in the bathroom when I was hiding.”
His jaw clenched. “And?”
“And I…” Tears formed, but I blinked them away. Ollie could tell; his eyes bounced back and forth between mine as his mouth fell into a frown. “I saw him come pretty damn close to snorting something.” I swallowed a lump, trying to look away, but Ollie held my chin straight and shook his head.