“I don’t know if I can let go like that. What you describe sounds so amazing, but then I think about the fears, about my sister and Kenny and what could become of them if I’m not right there giving them all of me. You don’t understand,” she said and then held Sparrow’s hand on her lap.
Beck caressed her hair and her back. “Talk to us. Make us understand your fears.”
“We’ll go slow, Valentina. We’re not going to take you away from your sister and Kenny. We’re going to help all of you and be part of your lives, hopefully part of your heart, Valentina,” Ridge added.
She looked up at him.
“I want you to know that I love what we did. How each of you made me feel tonight. Just letting go a little and giving into these feelings I have for each of you was amazing. It was powerful and like nothing I’ve ever felt before. That power was also scary, too. What if things don’t work out? What if one of you stops caring, or all of you? It’s a lot to consider. And then where does that leave me?
I don’t think I can take another emotionally traumatic experience in my life. It’s been hard enough trying to deal with everything, and I’ve honestly always held back on giving my heart up to any man, to any person other than my family. I just don’t know if I have the strength, no matter how much I hoped coming here would help my sister and I achieve salvation. That this town was more than a name, it was fate and a place to heal and be free.”
Jace felt his gut clench and his heart ache for her. She was obviously fearful for a whole lot of reasons.
He pulled her close. “We all have our fears and concerns. It’s normal. We can take all the time you need. We’re not going anywhere, Valentina. Salvation is our home. It’s where we, too, have sought out our salvation, our peace, as we try to live normal lives. We’re in this together. I promise you,” Jace told her, cupping her cheek and pulling her toward him to kiss her softly on the lips. In no time at all, that kiss grew stronger, more sensual, and he rolled her to her back, pressed between her legs, and explored her mouth thoroughly until they were both panting for breath. When he finally released her lips, she looked so sexy and well-kissed.
“You keep that up, Mr. Green Beret, and I won’t be able to leave you. To leave any of you.”
“Oh, yeah, let’s keep on kissing her, then. Move on over, Jace, it’s my turn,” Ridge stated firmly, and they all chuckled.
Chapter 7
“I have nothing to say. I don’t know why you keep coming here,” Roxie said to Valentina. Valentina sighed. She glanced at the three kids as they remained on the floor next to the couch. They didn’t go play with some of the other kids. They looked scared and sad, especially the six-year-old.
The one-year-old baby was crying up a storm now. Roxie wasn’t even holding her right. She didn’t have her pressed to her chest, to feel the comfort of her mother’s embrace. Instead, she had her laying low on her lap, the baby’s neck tilted in an uncomfortable fashion.
Valentina couldn’t take it any more as she sat there wondering why this woman was being so defiant.
“I can’t take this. I just want out of here and to
be left alone.”
“Well, that isn’t going to happen. You can’t just go wherever. You have no money, no means of surviving on your own, and the second you do and Samuel finds you, you’re as good as dead.”
“That’s not true. He won’t kill the mother of his children,” she said with attitude and then shifted the baby and rocked her hard. It was killing Valentina to watch how uncaring this woman was. She was starting to think that placing these kids in foster care would be better for them.
“Stop that. Go play or something,” Roxie snapped at the little six-year-old and gave his shoulder a shove.
God, it was making Valentina nuts, especially as the baby continued to cry. The four-year-old looked at her mother with fear in her eyes. Every cop instinct and motherly instinct in Valentina’s body was on alert. Had her boss and the detectives even looked into the well-being of these children? Did Roxie really even care about them, or was she just holding onto them in order to keep their father in her life? She had seen it before in cases in the city. The children always suffered. It didn’t sit right with her.
The baby was screaming now, and Roxie was moving her onto the couch like she was done trying and that was it. Glancing toward one of the women who ran the shelter, Valentina saw the disgust on her face, but another woman needed help.
“Let me try,” Valentina said to her.
Roxie looked at her. “Go ahead. She cries all the time. She’s never happy or content. I’m stuck here with these three babies. I didn’t even want them,” she stated. Valentina’s heart ached as she saw the six-year-old and four-year-old look about ready to cry, but then they turned away and stared off, watching the other kids play with blocks and trucks on the rug.
Valentina rocked the baby in her arms and held her tightly. She looked down into her eyes and then spoke to her calmly. As the baby settled down, the tears sitting on her thick black eyelashes, Valentina smiled.
“I think someone just wants to be held close and rocked to sleep,” she whispered.
Roxie stared at her and leaned back, looking at her nails and away from the scene as if she didn’t even care.
Valentina felt the tiny hand on her leg and looked to the right to see the four-year-old. “Is this your baby sister?” Valentina asked her.
The little girl nodded. “She’s so sweet. Do you like babies?” she asked her, and the little girl nodded her head. Then she climbed up next to Valentina and sat beside her. She reached over and caressed her baby sister’s cheek. Valentina continued to rock the baby, and then the four-year-old crawled next to Valentina’s feet and sat close to her. She felt his hand on her leg and his head on her thigh. It took so much effort not to cry for these kids.
She looked at their mother.
“You want them, you can have them. They’re nothing but a burden,” she said and stood up.