Well, minus Kevin, but again, that was different. Kevin had been his soul mate. His intimate lover. Scott was neither, and never would be, but he did somehow still own a piece of Max’s heart. Which was surprising in itself, since up until Scott, Max wasn’t even sure he still had a heart.
Max shifted in the silence, contemplating the whys. Because ever since Kevin, Max had never connected with others. Not closely, that is. Not in any way that felt real. Sure, he had some friends whom he shared a camaraderie, especially in his BDSM circles, but he intentionally kept them all at arm’s length. As a precautionary measure, just a general rule of thumb. Even guys like Chaz, Luke, and Roger. Because the farther he kept them away, the less power they had to do damage. Just common fucking sense in Max’s book.
And of course, Max’s subs, whom he adored taking care of, he kept at an even safer distance. Because sex, especially in such intense situations, could easily become harbingers of disaster. One had to be prudent when playing with that kind of fire, couldn’t for one second let their guard down. Max had learned that lesson long ago and had no intention of repeating it. Never again would he allow himself that type of connection. And the heart of how his Dom lifestyle worked. Intimacy without intimacy. Playtime with strict parameters.
Which, again, was why his new friendship with Scott was so refreshing. His very own fix-it project, twenty-four-seven, with a person who didn’t pose any risks. Someone to take care of, to keep from harm, to protect when their weary soul turned vulnerable. Max sighed and looked down, suspecting on some level that Scott might help Max fix himself, too. Not in the sense that Max thought he was broken. Just closed off maybe a bit too tightly. Which made for a really lonely life sometimes. Come to think of it, since Kevin, Scott was the only other person Max had ever felt the urge to be friends with. True friends. But again, not like the friendship he had with Kevin. The kind that was safe, that could never go wrong, regardless of outside interference.
And Max needed that. He knew he did. But it wasn’t just about his needs. It was about what he sensed Scott needed as well. Scott needed security. Scott needed structure. Scott needed a solid foundation. And Max could give that to him. He had no doubt.
Finally. A person in Max’s life to be strong for.
His heart pounded faster as he gazed at Scott’s form, sleeping peacefully across the room. He wanted, no needed, to do something soon, to change their arrangement to more permanent. Otherwise, Scott would eventually insist on leaving, not wanting to impose on Max indefinitely. Because Scott was a stand-up guy like that. Not above accepting help when he needed it, but unwilling to be an endless burden. Which only made Max want to help him that much more. Not just with the job he’d gotten Scott at Luke’s gym, or by sharing his clothes and his food. Something more concrete. Something more stable.
As soon as Scott woke up, Max was going to take the plunge. Fingers crossed that Scott would accept.
As if he’d subconsciously projected some alarm clock into Scott’s brain, Scott stirred on the sofa a second later.
Rubbing his eyes, he let loose a yawn, stretched his lanky body, then spotted Max. “Oh. Uh… hey,” he mumbled, still drowsy. “I didn’t, uh, see you sitting there.”
Max leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, anxious to get down to business. “Morning, sleepy head. Got some shit I wanna talk about. Need coffee or something for your brain?”
Scott tensed and sat up, his features quickly wakening. “No. I’m good. Is something wrong?”
Max shrugged. “That depends. You like crashing here, bro?”
Scott blinked, then frowned. “You need me to go.”
Max shook his head. “No, that’s not—”
“Because I totally understand.” Scott scanned the floor and spotted his shoes. “I mean, God, I was only supposed to stay here one night.” He snagged up his right sneaker and shoved it on, then reached for his left one next. “You’ve been so nice to me, so fucking generous. Honestly, man, I really appreciate it.”
“No. Scott. Listen.” Max gestured for him to stop. “I was just trying to ask a simple question.”
Scott stilled and looked at him, fresh confusion in his eyes. “Oh… I just thought…”
“I know. It’s all good.” A smile tugged at Max’s lips. “I was just wondering if you liked it here. That’s all.”
Scott tilted his head curiously, as if still not exactly sure where Max was going with this. “Um. Yeah. Definitely. I definitely like it here. Because of you, though. You’ve been a great friend.”
Max’s insides warmed. He nodded and looked down. “Yeah, well. I told you I’d be one if you needed it.” He shrugged and looked back up, not wanting to get sidetracked. Locking his eyes with Scott’s, he drew in a breath. “You can stay here if you want, like long-term and shit.”