No time to waste.
I immediately march to his desk and open every drawer I can find. I brush past a bunch of papers, old records, photographs of people, business, clients, drugs, all of it is there. But on the bottom, a particular photograph captures my attention.
As I pull it out, my hand begins to shake violently.
The photo drops to the floor.
A shriek catches in my throat and comes out shrill and empty, like the song of a dying swan.
On the cold, hard floor below me lies a picture with the face of a man I thought was long gone.
But his bushy-bearded chin, long, grown-out hair, and strong facial features have matured beyond death’s grasp.
A man whose eyes are filled with tears of betrayal, whose penetrative gaze could tear out my soul with a single deadpan at the camera.
Liam.
Chapter 30
Luca
* * *
I’m driving as fast as I can, chasing the horizon, going far beyond the speed limit as I race down the streets to get there in time.
My phone buzzes continuously on the seat next to me.
It’s one of my guards, but I know he isn’t calling me without reason.
Jill.
I contemplate picking up, but what will happen if I do?
Whatever comes out of his mouth will make me unhinged.
I grumble out loud, grinding my teeth as I shift the gear into the highest possible and hit the gas.
No fucking time to find out.
It’s now or never.
Jill
* * *
Ten minutes ago
* * *
With tears rolling down my cheeks, I pick up the photo from the floor and stare at it.
My fingers graze across Liam’s face, my lips quivering at the thought of touching him. Of touching the man he’s become.
Three years.
Three years have passed since I last saw his face, and here he is, right in front of me.
All grown up.
Just like me.
Alive.
My heart feels like it hasn’t beaten since I first laid eyes on this picture.
I want to bend over and scream.
Instead, I slam the picture down on the desk and rummage through the drawer. I tear it out of the track and throw all the contents out onto the floor in a rampage. I don’t stop until the entire desk is empty and all the evidence flies around me like the dead leaves tumbling off the trees in autumn. And I am weeping, bending through the knees, crawling through the remnants of my own dead, broken heart.
Plenty of tears roll down onto the papers as I gather the pictures and splay them out onto the floor below me. At least a dozen if not more of Liam walking around in a place I don’t recognize, at sea, catching fish, in the mountains, digging holes, looking awfully scruffy and … at peace.
How?
But more importantly … why?
My brazen, hot tears stain the pictures, and I roar out loud in broiling rage as I get up from the floor and stampede through the penthouse.
All this time. All this fucking time, he was alive.
And Luca knew.
He fucking knew.
And he didn’t tell me.
In my rage, I throw around furniture, but nothing eases the pain in my heart or stops the uncontrollable sobs from tearing through my soul. Until I come across a mirror and stare at myself, lifting the oversized sweater to touch the markings on my skin.
His ownership over me.
Scars of betrayal.
I scratch at the word until I bleed, screaming out loud until I’ve smashed the fucking mirror too.
Then I stuff Liam’s picture in my pocket, pick up the knife I dropped when Luca fucked me, and march to the door. “Let me the fuck out right now!”
Suddenly, the door opens and in steps a burly guard I’ve never seen before. Probably one of Lex’s men here to guard the place after most of Luca’s men got killed in the shoot-out with Nick the other day.
“What the hell is going on in here?” he growls.
“Didn’t Luca ever tell you not to put your nose where it doesn’t belong?” I reply, stepping closer and closer.
“Get back,” he commands, the look on his face vicious. “Stay inside.”
“Get out of my way,” I respond. “Don’t make me hurt you.”
He laughs. “I’d like to see you try.”
When he lunges at me with a gun in his hands, I duck and slide, and I stab him in the thigh.
He cries out in pain and falls to the floor, roaring out loud. I snatch his gun away from him and knock him in the back of the head. He drops down onto the floor, out cold.
I didn’t want to shoot him. It feels wrong, especially because he’s only paid to do this and didn’t do anything bad to me.
Still, I warned him.
I walk into the hallway and go inside the guard room on the left. It’s filled with monitors and equipment to keep an eye on the building, with cameras inside the lobby and outside to make sure no one gets in unnoticed.