I was humiliated. I’d never been modest about nudity. Hell, I’d exposed myself countless times while commanding aphids. But this was forced, my control taken from me. Last time this happened… Fuck, I couldn’t think about that. I already looked weak, helpless, and I despised that feeling. It soured inside me like a cold, dead thing, bubbling with rotten acid, ready to explode in a stomach-emptying fit of rage.
I didn’t care what purpose my humiliation served. They should’ve fucking asked me.
“Let go of me!” I fought against the unbending force that was Link and Roark, kicking and growling and spitting, my skin reddening beneath their grips. “Motherfuckers! You’re going to regret this.”
“Let her go.” The blond man in front aimed his gun at Link’s head, his hands and voice shaking. “Let her go now!”
The two men behind him balked with frozen expressions, the whites of their eyes stark in sunlight as they took a step back, their weapons forgotten in their hands.
In a blur of movement, Link released me, disarmed the blond man, and turned the gun on him, pointing it directly between his eyes.
Before the other two men could react, Link laughed, lowering the gun and patting the guy’s face. “You’ll do, kid. All I needed was a flinch, like your buddies there, and it would’ve been enough. But you went hog wild and stood up for her. I respect that.” He flipped the pistol and handed it back, grip first. “But if you ever lose your weapon like that again, I’ll kill you myself.”
Roark tugged my shirt back in place and let me go. Adrenaline crashed through my veins, and my heart banged heavily in my chest. I couldn’t look at him. Didn’t want to be anywhere near him.
As I ran back to the van, a stream of Link’s men slipped out of nowhere. Crossbows at the ready, they jogged in the direction I’d come from.
The door of the van opened for me and slammed shut as I crawled in.
I scooted to the far side of the cargo area and hugged my knees to my chest, waiting for my breathing to normalize and my energy stores to replenish.
Darwin licked my face, his weight leaning against me as I stroked his fur. I just needed a few minutes to pull my thoughts together, but Jesse wasn’t having it.
He gripped my arm and yanked me toward the front, planting my ass in the passenger seat and kneeling beside me. “Tell me why I stayed here instead of taking Roark’s place.”
I gnashed my teeth. Jesse knew I’d be fuming mad about this plan. Better for him if Roark played the bad guy, right?
“Because you’re a fucking coward.”
“Evie,” he growled, his voice hard and impatient. “Think past your anger.”
I looked away, my gaze locking on the back of Roark’s head. He stood halfway between the van and the building where Link and his crew calmly talked with the new men. Roark anchored his hands on his hips, his head down, his thick boxer's shoulders lifting and tightening around his ears.
This was why Jesse sat me here, so I could see the regret clinging to Roark’s posture. Or maybe it was so I’d notice the driver’s side window rolled down and the seat adjusted to lean toward the steering wheel.
I dragged in a deep breath, cooling some of the heat in my blood. “You stayed in the van so you could hide behind the driver’s seat and train your arrow out the window.”
Roark could gut an army of men with his sword, but not from thirty yards away, which meant he had to be the one to drag me out there.
Jesse reached up and stroked the backs of his fingers over my jaw. “I never took my eyes off the blond guy’s trigger finger. Link’s snipers were ready, but I will never leave your protection in the hands of a man who isn’t one of your guardians.”
“Why didn’t you just tell me the plan?”
He dropped his arm, resting it across my thigh. “Those prospects needed to see fear on your face. The kind you can’t fake. You knew Roark wouldn’t hurt you, but you don’t like to appear weak. That’s what drove you to fight with every breath you had.”
I hated that he knew all my pathetic shortcomings. I curled my hands in my lap, my head tilting away.
As far as recruiting went, offering those men a woman to rape was an effective way to test their integrity. They might’ve given in to their carnal urges eventually, but those first few seconds were telling. A rotten man wouldn’t have flinched. Especially not in this sadistic world.
Link’s previous recruiting methods had taken much longer, involving hours of conversations while he attempted to flesh out strengths and weaknesses. In the last town, he pretended he was stabbed and pleaded for help. He hadn’t expected the approaching men to help him. He’d been looking for a glimmer of sympathy in their eyes. Instead, those fuckers raised their guns to finish him off. Needless to say, he’d left a few dead bodies castrated in the street.