“Baby, just remember how much I love you.”
“That goes both ways, Luke. You need to remember how much I love you. How much I need you. How much I don’t want you to leave.”
Another heavy sigh meets my ears. “I do understand. I can’t promise I’m going to be here forever, sweetie. I wish I could, but I can’t.”
“What are you hiding?”
And again, more silence.
“Can you get me an audience?” he asks finally. “With Reid Wolfe?”
“I can try.”
“Okay. And if you can’t, that’s okay too.”
“When will I see you?”
“I’m not sure, baby. Maybe tonight. I’ll text you if it’s possible.”
“Okay. I love you, Luke.”
“I love you too, Katelyn. Always.”
The call ends, but I keep the phone in my ear, as if it’s my last lifeline to Luke.
All the sobbing… I thought he had left me. Indeed he did. But something brought him back. Was it Pollack?
Why all the questions about Pollack? Luke knows the kind of things that went on at that island. But Pollock was unique. No, he didn’t physically touch me. Unless you count with his urine stream.
But he was my least favorite of all the men who visited me there.
Lovebird used to beat me.
Broomstick would sodomize me with a broom handle.
And Camouflage…
Camouflage liked to hunt me.
He was hardly alone. A lot of them liked to beat me and rape me and even hunt me.
But Camouflage took hunting to a new level.
Then…the time they all descended on me… When I became Moonstone…
Moonstone saved me from all of them except Ice Man.
“No!” I finally move the phone from my ear and throw it against the wall.
I can’t. I can’t go back there.
And it dawns on me then.
Yes, I’m humiliated, and yes, it’s embarrassing to tell Luke what Ice Man did to me.
But the real reason is that I cannot bear to say the words. I’ve said them in therapy so many times, and now…I just can’t.
I’m trying to take back my life, and if I dwell on what happened to me, I won’t be able to do that.
I’m not blocking it out. Far from it.
But I can’t talk about it anymore. Especially not to Luke. I want our life together to be perfect. We’re in love, and I can’t let anything damage that.
I head to the bathroom and wash my face, tempted to scrub the redness away, but that will only make it worse. Instead, I let the water run until it’s ice cold and then I rinse my face ten times. Ten more times.
Next, some eye drops take care of the redness.
But my nose and eyes are still swollen. Not much I can do about that.
And it’s time to go over to Zee’s place. To that horrid building.
It’s okay. I can handle it. I went for the interview, and I can go to visit baby Honor.
I try a little bit of makeup, but it only makes me look worse. I dab it all away with a cotton ball and makeup remover. I change my clothes. Black leggings and a pink tunic. Not my best look, but it will have to do.
I lock up and go downstairs to hail a cab.
Time to buck up. To face life.
Always. I will not let the bastards grind me down.
7
LUKE
“She wouldn’t tell me,” I say to Pollock, “so you’re going to.”
“No.”
I drop my gaze to my pistol sitting in my lap. “I don’t need to remind you about the gun.”
“I can’t.” His cheeks are red.
“Embarrassed, are you?”
“It’s not me. There were just things that… The island made me do it.”
“Right. You’re not responsible for your own actions.”
Again, the similarities between us are not lost on me.
The fact that I could be looking at myself angers me. Pollack is a degenerate, but was I anything less before I got help? Before I escaped the life I made for myself?
“I could use a fucking drink,” Pollack says.
“Excuse me?”
“Sorry. I could just use a damned drink.”
“No.”
“Are you sure? I’ve got some good shit.”
“I don’t fucking drink, asshole.”
“Oh.”
“And if you think I’m going to play bartender for you while I hold my gun on you, think again.”
Pollack rubs his forehead. “Fine. You win. I’ll stay away from her.”
“Damn right you will, and if you’re not going to tell me what you did to her, I’m going to assume the worst. And if you know anything about me, you know I can make sure that you’re punished appropriately.”
He visibly shudders once more. I wonder if he’s pissing his pants, he looks so scared.
“Fine. What are you going to do to me?”
“The fact that you went to all the trouble to find out who I actually was shows me that Katelyn is important to you. Degenerates like you don’t have normal emotions, so I’m thinking you’re obsessed with her, which means I can tell you to stay away from her all day. I can get a restraining order against you. But if I’m right, you will continue to stalk her. Because you’re obsessed.”