“Indeed.” Lizzy barely acknowledged her words as she helped herself to smoked haddock and scrambled eggs.
“Yes, he wondered if you liked to go walking with him.”
“I think I’d rather walk alone,” Lizzy said, concentrating on her food, not caring who else considered her rude to Mrs Hodge.
But she was surprised when she stepped outside half an hour later, having changed into a blue velvet pelisse, and Lady Quamby accosted her. Lizzy wondered how their hostess could look so dewy fresh even in the harsh sunlight when she had had such a very late night. Lizzy herself felt woolly-headed and heavy-lidded.
“I was worried about you, Lizzy. Would you mind if I accompanied you?”
“Of course not.” Surprised, Lizzy stepped onto the path that led towards the lake. Lady Quamby must be concerned about the obviously scandalous liaison Lizzy had witnessed.
“I am a woman of my word, Lady Quamby,” she assured her as they reached the lake’s edge in silence. They stopped and gazed out at the swans.
“I am sure you are, Miss Scott. And I am not concerned in the slightest over my reputation, I assure you. It’s hardly a secret.”
Lizzy couldn’t help her short intake of breath, but she kept her gaze averted and overlooked the calm waters until, after a while, Lady Quamby said, “Shall we continue to the folly? There’s someone there who would like to see you.”
“Mr McAlister?” The words were out before Lizzy could help herself.
Lady Quamby looked regretful. “You do recall all the very good reasons why you, yourself, acknowledged he’s not the man for you, Lizzy. “No, my dear, I’m talking about Mr Dalgleish whom I found as cast down as a kitten in a pond. He’d been waiting for you, he told me, but you hadn’t made your appointment.” She touched Lizzy’s cheek. “You told me you were confused about your feelings for him, something which I perfectly understand. Handsome young men with rakish reputations have that effect.”
Lizzy took a long time answering as
she watched the water lapping gently at the edge of the lake. Far ahead, the countryside stretched into the distance, white and magical. “I suppose so.”
“You do like him, don’t you? You certainly seemed to earlier. Is there anything you dislike about him?”
Lizzy was silent.
“He’s handsome, isn’t he? He’s been good to you?”
Lizzy thought of his crinkled smile, the humorous quirk to his lips, his curling dark-brown hair, blue eyes, and the admiration with which he showered her.
She nodded when Lady Quamby prompted her.
“Then what is it that concerns you? Have you kissed him?”
Lizzy swung round. “Under the mistletoe. It was a very quick kiss.”
“But it put you into a state of disorder and you feel guilty.” Lady Quamby looked satisfied, as if she’d read the situation correctly when it was so far off the mark.
“I wished I felt more,” Lizzy said urgently. She sighed. “If I am to marry him, then surely there is so much more to expect.”
Lady Quamby was looking at her as if she were a very interesting specimen. “Oh yes, there is so much more to expect.” She took Lizzy’s arm. “And perhaps we should go to the folly where Mr Dalgleish is waiting for you. Perhaps it is only right that you should discover what you really should expect from marriage.”
Lizzy wasn’t sure what to think or say. Obediently, she allowed herself to be led along the path to the little stone castle just beyond the rise, tucked out of sight as it nestled by the lake’s edge.
Mr Dalgleish was waiting for her? Lady Quamby thought Lizzy should learn more of what to expect?
Did she want to?
Should she?
But then, Mr McAlister didn’t want to marry her. Or rather, if he did, he was in no position to be able to do so. The more she thought about it, the more she thought he must have compromised the young lady she’d seen him dancing with. She wasn’t exactly sure what being compromised entailed, and she wasn’t sure if she would be compromised by stepping through the door that was suddenly right in front of her.
But if Lady Quamby was sanctioning it—no, encouraging it, then wouldn’t she be shielding herself from the very thing she ought to be experiencing if that was the reason she gave herself for objecting to him? After all, the kiss had been but a brush of the lips.
And when she’d kissed Theo, the feelings inside her had grown exponentially with the length of the kiss.