e rest of us (especially since Charlie kept shooting frowns at Darren and me, causing us to barely speak above a whisper for fear of being fisted or something), but it was just more. More people, more food, more conversations rising and rolling over each other.
It was something I thought on often, the idea of family being what you make it to be, not necessarily what you were born into. Granted, there was a chance that I’d be in the same place I was now if my parents hadn’t died, but what if I wasn’t? I was of the firm belief that everything happened for a reason, and while some reasons could be extraordinarily shitty, they’d still led me to the place I was right now.
Surrounded by people that I cared about.
Including my fake boyfriend.
Who I had real feelings for.
And who might feel the same way about me.
Even though we were technically lying to everyone in the room.
Except for Charlie.
And it was made slightly worse by Charlie, the bastard. Especially when he said (in a rather innocent tone of voice), “Did you see on the news about the mayor?”
Conversation pretty much came to a halt then.
I vowed to find the nearest nursing home with the poorest rating as soon as I could get my hands on a computer.
Larry and Matty gave slightly nervous glances toward Sherry, but she waved them away. “It’s fine,” she said with a wine-tinged grin. “I haven’t talked to him in years. It doesn’t bother me to hear about him. I’ve moved on. Repeatedly.”
“Mom,” Darren said, sounding horrified.
“Well maybe it bothers other people,” I said, eyes never leaving Charlie.
“Vince?” Charlie asked. “Does it bother you?”
“Nah,” Vince said. “I have stuffing and Paul, so I’m good.”
“Aww, babe,” Paul said. “Next time, don’t list me after stuffing.”
“But I can eat the stuffing now,” Vince said. “I can’t eat you until later.”
Pretty much everyone at the table made gagging sounds, even Sherry. Because that was gross. She was fitting right in.
“Darren, are you bothered?” Charlie asked, and I knew what he was doing.
“Um,” Darren said, looking between Charlie and me. “No?”
Charlie grinned. I did not. Darren figured out it was the wrong answer when I tried to stab him with my fork, but by then, it was too late. And also because he stole my fork.
“What news would that be, Charlie?” Matty asked. “Is it that he’s resigning and apologizing for ever opening his mouth?” She set down her wineglass. “Oh my, that was slightly vindictive of me. Darren, Vince, I apologize. I should have never said that in front of you. At the very least, I should have waited until you left the room, then said it. I feel terrible.”
Vince shrugged. “I don’t care. I don’t really talk to him at all.”
“That’s because you have other parents now.” Larry reached over and patted his hand. He looked at Darren. “And keep it up, young man. I could be your daddy too.”
I choked on my wine.
Matty leaned over and whispered in his ear.
“Uh-huh,” Larry said. “Uh-huh. You don’t say. Right. Oh. I can see how someone might get confused at that. Right. Right. Okay.” Matty leaned back as Larry spoke to Darren. “It has come to my attention that I should not refer to myself as your daddy. If that is your kink you share with Sandy, then that’s okay, because I am not one to kink shame. But I was not hitting on you and asking you to be my baby boy. For one, I’m in a monogamous relationship with a beautiful woman. And two, you are committed to Sandy, who is my drag son.”
“Glad we cleared that up,” Darren said.
“I’m the only daddy here.” Charlie crossed his arms over his chest.