“I know you do and I’m glad.” And I believe her.
“Anna?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask you a question? Not about us?”
“Yes,” she says immediately.
“Did you… why did you call Otter last night?”
She takes a deep breath and exhales slowly. “Did he come over?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Good. You needed a friend. I knew that he would understand what you’re going through. He told me….” And then she stops, as if catching herself.
“Told you what?” I ask, curious.
She curses softly. “He told me about what happened to him in San Diego. I called him, probably sounding hysterical. Once I was able to calm down enough, he told me the story.”
“He did?” I say, trying to keep the surprise out of my voice. And don’t I feel a pang of something else? Doesn’t it feel strangely like jealousy? But who in God’s name am I jealous of?
She hears it in my voice. “Don’t be like that, Bear,” she chides me.
I startle when there’s a tap-tap-tap at my window. I look up and see Otter staring curiously into the car. I realize that I have been out here for quite a while. Telling Anna to hold on for a minute, I roll down the window.
“Everything cool?” he asks calmly as he leans in. His finger drapes dangerously close to my arm.
“Yeah,” I say quickly. “Just on the phone. I’ll be right in.”
He gives me a knowing look and walks back inside.
“Sorry,” I say, putting the phone back on my ear.
“Was that Otter?” she asks, her voice betraying nothing.
I can’t lie to her now. “Yes. He’s making the Kid a tofu lasagna, and Ty would murder me if I hadn’t brought him.”
“That sounds less than appetizing.”
“You’re telling me. At least you don’t have to eat it.” And she laughs and something somewhere rights itself. Maybe not back into the position that it was in before, but close. So very close.
“So, you were saying?” I ask.
“What? Oh, right. Otter. Well, I don’t know how much more I should say. If you’re going to hear it, it should be from him. And don’t try to force it, either, Bear. I know you too well and that’s the only reason I say that. And just so you know, I didn’t really tell him what the fight was about.”
“I know.”
“After he got done telling me his reasons for coming back, I realized he could understand. More than most people could. And I knew that you needed someone to talk to. But I also know you probably didn’t say anything to him. That’s just what you do.”
“I kind of cried and fell asleep,” I admit.
She laughs but then sobers. “Don’t keep it inside forever, Bear. You’ll end up hating yourself if you do.”
“Thank you,” I say, wishing she was right next to me so she could see just how sincere I am.
“You’re welcome. Tell Ty I love him for me. I’m going to let you go now, okay?” I know she means hang up the phone, but there is something more to those last words she speaks, and I can hear her waiting for me to answer. I rack my brain, wondering if there is anything left unsaid, anything that I think she should know. Nothing comes to mind, and it breaks my heart just a little bit mo