“It used to be worse,” Mom said as she watched me taking in everything. “We’re putting things back together.”
I nodded tightly.
“And now that you’re here, things will start looking up,” Dad said, patting my arm. “We knew you’d come back. It was just a matter of time. You’ll see. Everyone will be so thankful you’re here once word has spread.”
“Really. Then I suppose that’s just a remnant of times past?” I pointed to a poster hanging from an announcement board filled with missing person flyers and requests for services. It was in the upper left-hand corner, slightly weathered, as if it’d been there for a long time. I could only make out the top few sentences, but it was enough.
SAM OF WILDS HAS ABANDONED VERANIA!
HIS SHAME AT THE DEATH OF MORGAN OF SHADOWS WAS TOO GREAT!
THE WE-HATE-SAM-A-LOTS ARE HERE FOR YOU IN THIS TIME OF NEED!
THE NEXT MEETING IS SET FOR
The rest was faded away.
“I thought you’d gotten all of those,” Mom hissed at Dad.
“I thought I did too,” he said thoughtfully, running a hand over his beard. “Things aren’t like that anymore, Sam. They haven’t been for a long time.”
“Well, not completely,” Mom added hastily. “Once Lady Tina left the We-Hate-Sam-A-Lots—”
“Oh, great. Let’s talk about her some more.”
“—they sort of splintered off and tried to keep going on their own. I don’t know how well that went for them in the long run.”
“I ate a woman once,” Kevin said, flicking his tongue out at a group of people who scattered, screaming, arms flailing above their heads. “I have no problem in doing it again if the situation should arise. And no, I’m not being misogynistic. I would eat a man just the same if they tried to mess with Sam.”
“Your threat of murder is touching,” I told him honestly. “I like you.”
He grinned at me.
“It’s different now, Sam,” Dad said, not unkindly. “Obviously. You left, and Verania changed. But it wasn’t always for the worse. In the darkest times, a light will appear in the most unlikely of places. Lady Tina has worked hard to correct past mistakes. We’ve had the benefit of seeing it up close. Your last interaction with her was of betrayal. She knows what she did, and she has sought to redeem herself for that.”
“What she did,” I repeated incredulously. “Are you—you’re serious. Let me tell you what she did. She actively fought against everything I stood for, turned thousands of people against me, planned my demise on countless occasions, and was complicit in a plot that nearly killed Ryan and led to Morgan sacrificing himself for me. And you think she’s redeemed herself?”
“Sam—”
I shook my head. “I can’t believe I’m hearing this. Not from you. You guys aren’t supposed to be like this. You’re supposed to be on my side.”
Mom’s eyes narrowed. “We have always been on your side. Every single day of your life. Even when you disappeared without a trace. We have the advantage of hindsight. You do not. There are things you don’t know, things that we’ve had to live through while you were gone. I’m not blaming you for anything, Sam. I would never do that. I knew in my heart you would return to us. You can’t expect—”
“Morgan died because of her,” I snapped, and before I could stop it, the ground cracked beneath my feet. In the grand scheme of things, it was a small event; the dirt and grass shifted and split twice the length of my foot. But it was built upon rage and a sense of loss, something the Great White had warned me about time and time again. Magic was supposed to come from a rational place of clear mind and thought. There was control in impassiveness, he’d told me. A wizard who could stay calm, cool, and collected was able to perform feats leaps and bounds above one who could not.
Morgan had been like that.
So had Randall, for the most part.
For the longest time after entering the Dark Woods and facing the Great White, I was a slave to my emotions. I felt nothing but rage and grief at all that I’d seen. At everything I’d lost. There were days when I could do no magic at all; still others when I had no control over the green and gold that leaked out of me and destroyed parts of the forest around me. My head had been pounding with—
I loved you, Sam of Wilds. Even then. Remember that, when the world seems dark.
—all that had been taken from me, what had been sacrificed to keep me alive because the gods had demanded it so. I blamed everyone but myself for the longest time. Trees caught fire; the earth shook beneath my feet as I screamed at the sky. I wanted revenge.
And I felt it then, didn’t I? The shadows curling at my feet.
Because it would have been so easy for me.