I hesitantly walk forward. If Rivers is Noah’s best man, then that means…shit. I am not ready for this.
Rivers offers me his arm and I look down at it knowing that this one touch is going to destroy me. I let out a breath. It’s just walking up to the end of the aisle and then that’s it, I can hurry away after that.
I can do this.
Wait. I’m going to have to dance with him at the reception.
Fuck me, this shit is too much.
My hand curls around his elbow and I ignore the way my skin burns against his strong arm. He’s wearing his suit jacket so it’s not as though my skin is even against his, but it’s more than enough.
We start making our way up the aisle and it doesn’t go unnoticed that Spencer walks behind us, accompanying one of Henley’s college friends while his eyes shoot daggers into our backs.
Poor Spencer. He doesn’t deserve this.
We get halfway up the aisle when River’s low, murmured voice cuts right through to my soul. “Can we talk?”
I shake my head ever so slightly while still trying my hardest to maintain my fake smile for the guests. “We have nothing to talk about. You left four years ago and never came back. You and me…whatever we had is long gone,” I tell him as I pull my hand free from his arm while taking the final step up the aisle. “I’ve moved on and you should too.”
With that, I walk away, willing the tears to stay at bay.
Chapter 3
Rivers
The music sounds around us, drinks are flowing, and the guest are having an incredible time. All but one. The maid of honor has spent more time at the bar than any other guest, drowning herself in alcohol.
I watch her time and time again, get up from the bridal table, head across the room, and order herself another drink. I can’t take it anymore, but just as she pointed out, I left years ago and now she’s moved on.
Yeah fucking right. I’ve never heard a bigger lie in my life.
If she had moved on, she’d be sitting right here next to me with a smile, asking all about my time in the military and catching up. Instead, she’s fucking miserable and it’s absolutely killing me.
I should have just stayed away, I should have watched from afar and given her the night to enjoy herself, then maybe tomorrow have let her know I was back and given her space before showing up on her doorstep. But then, standing up there beside my best friend as he married his girl meant the fucking world to me and despite my very presence making things hard for Tully, I wouldn’t have changed it for anything.
She’s strong. She’ll get past the ceremony. She needs to as I have a feeling things are only going to get harder from here on out as now that I’ve seen her again, I’ll never be taking my eyes off her.
I did it all ass up and now she’s a mess and not only has she got me to worry about, but it’s clear that my being here is causing some sort of issues between her and Spencer.
But seriously? What the fuck is she doing with that guy? Spencer fucking Jones. He was nothing but a fuckwit in high school, constantly running his mouth and seeing how much pussy he could get. She’s so much better than him, but then, I guess I’m not that much better.
Tully returns to her seat with a drink in hand and I scowl across at Spencer. If he’s her man then he should be doing something about this. He should be taking care of her, keeping her from this reckless behavior, and treating her like his queen, but he’s too fucking busy thinking about himself. The need to knock the fucker out has never been so strong.
Don’t fucking tell me this is the bullshit she’s been dealing with since I’ve been gone. Thank fuck for Noah and Henley keeping her grounded. I don’t even want to begin to think where she’d be without them.
Noah and Henley are pulled away by the photographer who want to take a million pictures of them doing the same boring shit over and over again and it leaves me, Tully, and Spencer at the table, each one of us looking down at our hands. I mean, this is awkward as fuck. If Spencer would just piss off, I could move in beside Tully and try to talk things through, but something tells me the bastard isn’t letting her out of his sight for the rest of the night.
Fuck this. The second I saw her, the decision was made. I’m moving back home. There’s no way in hell that I’ll be going back to live at the base, especially while things are so fucked up here. I don’t need to be there all the time, besides I’m on reserve now. I’ve just come home from a mission and have a feeling it will be a while before I’m deployed again, it ever over the next four years. At least I fucking hope so.