“No. Well, not naturally. Rocky is obsessed with it, so I spent some time researching how to do it, and well, I’m not blessed that way.”
“I don’t get it, so then what do you do?”
“Well, I kinda squirt water up there, and when I come, the contractions just squirt it out.” She laughs.
“Wow! I didn’t realize it’s this huge thing…”
“Totally. Guys are like obsessed with it,” she says casually, and due to my silence, puts two and two together followed by a loud gasp. “Oh, Adriana, please tell me you’re one of these people who can? Let me live vicariously through you.”
My face reddens. “Yes, but Nikki, I don’t know whether to be mortified or grateful.”
“Grateful… a squirter is always grateful,” she reassures me.
We both burst out laughing loud enough that Charlie makes her way over to us. She asks to talk to Nikki in private, so I leave them to it and make my way over to the other parents. Doing my duty as party host, I immerse myself in the conversations as we talk about our kids and compare parenting tips.
Both Nikki and Charlie return, the two of them looking much happier. I’m glad they had a moment to talk things out but made a mental note to check in with Nikki in a few days to make sure she is okay.
“So, go tell Adriana the great news?” Nikki nudges her with a grin.
“There’s great news?”
Charlie rolls her eyes at Nikki the same time Eric has caught wind of the conversation. When it came to so-called news or gossip, Eric is always front row and center with popcorn in hand.
“It’s not great news, just news,” Charlie clarifies. “My cousin, Noah, is coming to stay with us for a bit next month.”
Eric’s eyes widen while his hand clasps his chest as if you’ve just told him he’s won an Oscar.
“Noah, your hot, ‘spank me sideways because I want a piece of those man buns’ cousin?”
I raise my hand toward my mouth, covering the small laugh which escapes me. Charlie’s cousin Noah is hot, and yes, thanks to Eric I have seen his Instagram page. Charlie never speaks about him much except for him being a few years younger than her. The guy can pull off a suit, that’s for sure. And okay, the shirtless gym pictures are damn sexy. I blame Eric—he’s online stalking is borderline creepy.
“Can you not?” Charlie scowls, shaking her head. “He’s my baby cousin. Go back to saying inappropriate things about my husband. That’s less disturbing.”
“Baby cousin? Oh, honey, have you seen him in a suit? Let’s just say when you zoom in, his rooster is saying cock-a-doodle-doo.”
“This conversation is over. It’s like me talking about Lex in front of Adriana.”
I let out a huff. “Um, which you have several times. You know what? This is great payback. Go on Eric, tell Charlie about the gym shorts picture where you swore you saw his balls.”
Charlie opens her mouth wide, shocked I’d even gone there. Serves her right, like I want to hear about my brother and his insatiable dick.
With a devious smirk plastered on Eric’s face, Charlie walks off and leaves us behind.
“So, I’m thinking massive welcome party and we hook him up with Kate?” Eric suggests, waiting for my response.
“Oh, nice plan. You think she’d be into him?”
“Honey…” Eric places his hand on my shoulder. “Do you think this is my first rodeo? You leave this to me and focus on your gorgeous boyfriend.”
“If I wasn’t married, I’d so be tapping Noah’s man buns,” Nikki says as we all watch Rocky show the kids how he can eat two hot dogs in one sitting.
“I want to say you’re a lucky woman, but I’m torn between the thought and wondering how Rocky can fit so much in his mouth?” Eric questions.
Nikki shakes her head with a look of disgust. “Maybe Noah can be my toy boy on the side?”
Both Eric and I laugh at the same time.
Rocky is unaffected by our curious stares, enjoying the children’s demands as they challenge him to fit more hot dogs in his mouth. This could go two ways real fast.