I can either hand my heart over or place it in a panic room.
I walk to my vanity and open the little wooden box. Inside sits the engagement ring Julian gave me and the wedding band that Lex placed on my finger.
Two rings, two different men.
I pick up the diamond ring and slide it on my finger.
I don’t know what I’m doing, all I know is that tonight, I need to smile.
And if there’s one person who can make that happen, it’s Julian.
CHARLIE
Nine Years Ago
I tried Alex’s cell again, damn voicemail.
It was the morning after I saw him at ‘our’ place, and during the night, I had tried several times to call him. Maybe he was tied up with work. I hoped because the alternative was unbearable, and my paranoia grew deeper as more time had passed.
Something was off yesterday, and I sensed it despite Alex reassuring me everything was going to be just fine. He was demanding, physically, and while he had shown that side several times, yesterday was different. As long as we love each other, that’s all that matters he kept repeating over and over a
gain.
I walked into the kitchen, grabbed my wallet, and headed to the store. It was Saturday morning, and the streets were quiet, just the regulars eating their breakfast at the local diner. I walked into the grocery store and grabbed a box of Cheerios. Oh hell, and a Butterfinger while I was at it. Taking my items, I walked toward the counter.
Kaley.
She had been the death of me since junior high. I honestly believed she was some sort of human robot put on this earth to annoy the living daylights out of me. After prom, her vendetta against me tripled. She never explained why she hated me so much, and frankly, she wasn’t worth my energy.
“Hi, Kaley,” I reluctantly greeted her while placing my items on the counter.
“Shopping alone today?” She smirked, swiping each item as it pinged on the register. “No, um… boyfriend to help you out?”
“Excuse me? Seriously, you need to keep your lips shut, and by lips, I don’t just mean the ones on your face.”
So much for not exhausting my energy. I was tired, and my sleepless nights were catching up with me. Pulling my bills out of my pocket, I threw them on the counter willing this conversation to end.
“Oh, please, Charlie. You’re a fool for thinking Alex would leave his wife for you.”
I played dumb once again. This wasn’t the first time she had insinuated that Alex and I were a couple. It had occurred several times now since prom. She had this obsession with us, and no matter how much she tried to rile me up, I always had to hold my head high and pretend she was full of lies.
“I mean seriously, Charlie, he has a family to worry about now. You wouldn’t want to tear that baby’s life apart, would you?”
What?
My heart started pounding in my chest, my skin suddenly felt on fire, the pit of my stomach threatening to cave in right there on the floor tiles. I must have heard wrong or she was making up lies again. Yes, remember, Kaley has a degree in serial bullshitting, but she stood grinning like she had won the lottery. No. No. No.
“What the fuck did you just say?”
Her eyes widen with a satisfied smile fixated on her ugly face. The cruel joke she was playing brought her joy, a foolish lie to see my world fall apart.
“I said that Alex and Samantha were sitting in a tree. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a little baby sitting in a carriage.”
“You’re telling l… lies,” I stammered.
“Nope, I was there in the doctor’s office when Samantha walked out and told me.” Kaley leaned in, motioning me for me to join her. “Apparently, they had some wild night a month ago, and Alex couldn’t keep his hands off her. Totally explains why she’s pregnant.”
Everything started spinning, my world caving as I took in the information. I ran outside the store, vomiting all over the pavement. My chest felt tight, my breath uneven. Clutching my stomach, my mouth fell open as my legs began to shake, threatening to crumple to the ground.