As I walk into his apartment, it still takes me by surprise at how much it actually looks like the bat cave in the movies. The walls are dark but still have a warm ambiance.
We stand in his living room, which is very much like mine, not too large. A brown leather sofa sits in front of a massive flat-screen television. What’s it with men and their obsession with size? Opposite to that are rows and rows of bookshelves. They are crammed with so many books, which is expected considering he writes for a living.
He takes my hand, leading me to the kitchen, where I’m surprised to see the dining table set up with the plates and cutlery perfectly positioned, and two candelabras sitting in the middle of the table, the flames burning brightly.
“Oh wow, Julian, this is beautiful,” I say in awe.
A romantic gesture, but that’s Julian, he’s such a romantic guy.
He motions for me to take a seat, then he pours some wine into a glass. I’m not sure if I can handle any more alcohol, but I don’t want to offend him so I take tiny sips as he serves the first course.
We chat about the charity ball which led to a conversation about his work with Hungarian orphans. I watch him as he passionately tells the story about his journey and how much work he has done to help the children. The emotions are getting the better of him when he chokes up slightly. I lean and place my hand on top of his.
Here, before me, is a man who has a huge heart. He has so much compassion, more than anyone I’ve ever met.
Julian will never leave me without an explanation, nor will he ever hurt me so deeply.
And it always comes back to this.
Why am I constantly comparing him to Lex?
When we finish our meal, he clears the table while I wander back to the living room.
“Are you ready for your surprise now?”
His eyes dance as if a piece of forbidden fruit is being dangled before him.
I eagerly wait in anticipation as he walks out of the kitchen with a small plate of—wait! Is that? Yes, red velvet cupcakes with buttercream frosting.
“How did you know these are my favorite?”
My curiosity piques with drool almost trickling down the sides of my mouth
“A little birdie told me… Bakers in Brooklyn.”
That’s my favorite place in the whole world. They make the most scrumptious desserts, and these red velvet cupcakes are my weakness—next to Louboutins, of course.
“That’s funny, Bakers like your surname,” I point out.
“Yes, like my surname and my auntie’s.”
It takes a moment for the penny to drop. “Your aunty owns Bakers in Brooklyn? Julian, I could marry you right now.”
I lean over, positioning my body, so I’m straddling him. Grabbing the cupcake, I take a bite, closing my eyes and immersing myself in the different flavors. As I lick my lips, Julian’s hands sit nicely only my hips as he slowly grinds himself against me. I don’t know what feels better, the taste of him or the cupcake.
Then, he slowly pulls my dress above my thighs. His kisses move to my neck as he cups my ass making me moan, my eyes closing in delight.
The image of Lex plunging his fingers inside me flashes before me, breaking me from this moment. Letting out a whimper, my eyes open wide and in shock.
Oh fuck, I couldn’t have let him do that to me.
The sound of my phone vibrating in my purse interrupts us, a distraction that can’t be any more welcome. Julian pulls away like a gentleman, asking me if I need to answer it. I come up with an excuse about waiting for an important text from a client.
I just need to dissect the image—how every part of me begged for Lex to fuck me hard against the cold refrigerator door—but now isn’t the time. My ring almost jumps off my finger and punches me in the face, reminding me where I am, who I’m with, and most importantly—that I said yes.
Climbing off Julian, I take a deep breath while fumbling in my purse. The guilt is a chain around my neck, and worried he can sense it, I side-eye him only to see him fiddling with his watch.
You’re being paranoid. I obviously don’t have ‘I got fingered by my ex last night’ tattooed on my forehead.