I suck in a breath, but he continues on. “You know, I would have gotten you sooner. I saw you at that party a few months ago and I would have taken you then, but those fuckers, Jackson and Jesse wouldn’t leave you the fuck alone. Took me until now to realize that was your actual place.”
As he says the words ‘party’, I forget about the fact that he just admitted to dealing drugs and distantly notice the music coming from somewhere within the house, maybe downstairs? I don’t know, but a brief relief flows through me knowing there are other people here. Maybe I have a shot of getting out of this fucked up situation.
I go to stand, but Josh thrusts his hand into my shoulder, forcing me back down into the couch with a hard push. “Not yet, sweetheart,” he says, fingering the syringe. “You’ll need a few minutes for this baby to sink in, then we can party all you want.”
“Why are you doing this?” I question, looking around the room for some kind of out. “I haven’t done anything to you, yet you won’t leave me the hell alone.”
“You think you’re innocent in all this?” he yells. “My whole life has been fucked up because of you and your golden fucking pussy. If only you just gave it up to start with, none of this shit would have happened.”
“You tried to rape me in a broom closet,” I yell back at him as the blood pulsing through my body begins to feel like lead. My arms grow heavy and then my legs. “You had everything going for you at the start of senior year. You fucked it all up yourself.”
Josh’s hand flashes out with a speed I didn’t know was humanly possible before it slaps hard and fast across my face, instantly stinging the skin beneath it. “It was you and that fucking boyfriend of yours,” he yells back at me, going red in the face. “If it wasn’t for him, I would still be playing football. I lost my fucking scholarship. I lost my school. My friends. I lost my parent’s respect.”
“That had nothing to do with us. It was all you,” I tell him. “Whether or not me and Nate were together, I still would have turned you down and I still would have told the world what you did to me. You would have lost it all with or without Nate. You only have yourself and your fucked-up actions to blame. And now you’ve gone and done this,” I add. “You think me or Nate are going to let you get away with it? You think you have nothing now? Just wait until we’re done with you.”
Josh smirks down at me as though I’m some misbehaved child having a tantrum. “It’s funny. You were just collateral. I even kind of liked you at the start. A bit whiney but I bet you would have gone off in the sack. I would have probably left you alone after that, but your fucking boyfriend had to step in. Nate Fucking Ryder. He gets whatever the fuck he wants. Doesn’t even have to try. The school. The car. Popularity. The girls. Every fucking bastard out there is either scared shitless of him or wants to be his best fucking friend. That was supposed to be me. I was the fucking quarterback. Not him. Well, guess what? It’s all fucking over. I’m going to destroy him.”
I scoff as my mind starts to grow foggy. All I want is to close my eyes and make it stop, but passing out with Josh Henderson before me is not an option. I have to keep him talking. “Nate doesn’t get destroyed,” I inform him. “He destroys people. You should know, you’re a prime example.”
“A year ago, I would have agreed with you, but Nate has a weakness now, and I have you to thank for that.”
I suck in a shallow breath and try to focus on what he says as it starts to dawn on me. This past year. All the times he’s shown up at Broken Hill parties. It wasn’t to get at me. It was to use me against Nate.
All this time, it’s been Nate he was after. Not me. How could we not see this?
“What are you going to do?” I demand.
“Well, it’s one simple fix. Two birds, one stone, really,” he beams, proud of whatever plan he’s concocted. “In order to destroy Nate, I’m going to destroy you.”
“You’re going to rape me?” I scoff, absolutely terrified, but I won’t dare show him.
“Ha,” he laughs. “I’m not remotely interested in getting between your legs. You’re trash now. Used up and worn out,” he spits in disgust. “You used to be innocent. A virgin. I would have popped that fucking cherry. I was going to pop it, but that’s another thing Nate took away from me.”