The back and forth.
The push and pull.
All these unwelcome feelings I felt every time he looked at me.
“Oh, I’d love to hear all about what you think is wrong with me.” He leaned against the doorjamb blocking off my exit. Not that I was ready to leave; I still needed to get dressed.
“You’re entitled,” I said. “You’re used to people giving in to your every demand. You want to skip class, that’s fine because you’re a Raider. You want to fuck girls and then kick them to the curb and not get any shit for it, cool, you’re a Raider. You spend years making my life hell and then the one time you do something nice, I’m just expected to what? Drop my panties and let you—” I swallowed the words as Cameron’s expression turned hungry, his lip curved in an infuriating smirk.
“Does the idea of me fucking other girls upset you, Sunshine?” He stepped forward, forcing me back into the bathroom.
“Cameron, come on, this is—” But he kept coming until my butt hit the marble counter. My hands flew out behind me, steadying myself, and he chuckled.
“Do you know what I think?” he said. “I think you’re a judgmental bitch. You don’t know anything about me or my life. You only see the game. You couldn’t possibly pull your head out of your ass long enough to see what’s really going on here.”
My lips parted on a gasp. “I’m not...”
“But want to know what I really think?” Cameron dipped his head, crowding me further against the counter until the rough edge bit into my skin. “You don’t hate me, you hate yourself. I’m everything you loathe, but you want me anyway.”
“I...”
His mouth hovered over my lips, so close I could feel his warm breath. My body began to tremble, my stomach knotted so tightly I felt a little lightheaded.
“Why do you keep doing this?” I whispered, barely able to speak. Cameron was too much. His gaze unyielding, his body plastered against mine. His hands… God, his hands began to caress my sides, making it hard to think straight, let alone breathe.
“I just want you to admit it.” He nudged my nose with his. “Admit you want me and then I’ll leave you alone.”
“You will?” I gulped, my mind swimming with all things Cameron Chase.
He nodded slowly, his eyes still locked on mine. I’d never noticed before—or maybe I’d just refused to see it—but they were a dark shade of blue with flecks of silver-gray streaked through them. They reminded me of lightning across a stormy sky. Fitting really, considering how dangerous Cameron was turning out to be for my carefully constructed life.
“I’m waiting, Sunshine,” he said when I didn’t reply.
“Fine. If it means you’ll leave me alone... I want you,” I said with as little emotion as possible. “It makes no sense, goes against everything I stand for, and to be honest, makes me real disappointed in myself, but it’s the truth. Happy now?”
“Sunshine?” A slow smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“Y- yeah?”
“Shut up.”
And then he kissed me. Cameron Chase picked me up like I weighed nothing, dropped me on the counter, and kissed me.
“Cameron, wait.” My fingers gripped his shoulders, holding him back as I managed to break away. “What are we doing?”
He gave a throaty groan. “Let’s call it working out our differences.” One of his hands slid over my hipbone and underneath his jersey drawing a soft moan from my lips. “Don’t over-think it, Hailee.”
Don’t over-think it.
Right.
I could do that.
I could totally—
Cameron dived at me again, attacking my mouth. He threaded his hand into my hair, drawing me closer, sweeping his tongue past my lips and into my mouth. And damn him, I went willingly. I’d spent so long fighting, of being on the defensive. I couldn’t deny that, just for once, it felt good to give over. To switch to the offense for a change.
To stop thinking and just feel.