“Try three offers on the table from Division One schools including Penn,” Mackey grinned at me as if he was doing me a favor.
Asher stiffened beside me and then slammed his hand down on the table. “I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t want to talk about free beer. I want to talk about kicking some Marshall ass.”
A chorus of ‘hells yeah’ broke out in our corner of the bar. Jumping up onto the leather bench, he thrust his beer into the air. “What do y’all say? Do you think we can kick Marshall’s ass?”
The whole place erupted and I rolled my eyes at Jase who just stared out at nothing as if Asher wasn’t standing on the bench whipping Jerry’s patrons into a frenzy. “I can’t hear you.” He cupped his ear, playing to his rapt audience. “I said, do y’all think we’re going to kick some Musketeer ass on Friday?”
Kaiden jumped up, Mackey too. Until most of the younger players were up on their feet cheering and bouncing up and down. But I didn’t move. Neither did Jase or a handful of the other senior players. We’d been there,
done that. I didn’t begrudge them lapping it all up—the attention, the thrill of wearing a blue and white jersey—but I knew there was a whole world waiting out there for me. A world outside of Rixon and the Raiders. And while their time would come; for me, for Jase, and Asher, it was already here.
It was supposed to be the defining moment of our high school football career and yet, already, I didn’t know if my heart was in it.
And some days, I didn’t know how to deal with that.
Monday soon came around and with it the anticipation for the first game of the season. “Mornin’,” I said around a yawn as I padded into the kitchen, making a beeline for the refrigerator.
“Hey, sweetie,” my mom gave me a warm smile as she helped my little brother, Xander, eat his cereal, but I saw the dark rings around her eyes.
“Ameron.” He clapped vigorously, half-chewed cereal spraying from his mouth.
“Hi, buddy.” I chugged a carton of milk while ruffling his hair.
“Ameron ootball day?” Xander grinned up at me as if I was the best fucking thing to ever live, and my chest squeezed. The little shit was cute and so oblivious, I envied him.
I envied a three-year-old.
How fucking pathetic.
“Yeah, buddy.” I leaned back against the counter. “I have practice today. We’ve got our first game Friday.”
“Ame day!” His eyes lit up. “Mama, we o to ame day with Ameron?”
“We’ll see, baby.” She gave him a tight smile, her eyes flicking to mine and then dipping. But not before I saw the flash of regret there. “We’ll see.”
“Maybe Asher’s mom could bring him?” I suggested since it wouldn’t be the first time Mrs. Bennet brought him along. “If you’re, you know—”
“Yeah,” it came out quiet as she cleaned up my brother. “We’ll see.”
“Good morning, family.” Dad breezed into the room. “And how are we all this morning?” He pulled Mom in for a hug, dropping a kiss on her head, and they shared an intimate smile before he went to the coffee maker.
“First game of the season Friday then?” he directed at me. “How are you feeling?”
“Good,” I said barely paying him any attention as I watched Mom scoop up Xander and disappear out of the kitchen. “I’m ready.”
“It’s a big year, Son.” Dad sipped his coffee. “I wish things could be easi—”
“It’s fine, Dad.” I cut him off. I didn’t want to do this, not this morning. “I haven’t decided anything yet, there’s still time.”
He nodded, understanding simmering in his eyes. “I’ll try my hardest to be there but—”
“I know.” The words almost choked me.
“Marshall Prep could be a tough first game. They have a strong defense with that Belson kid, right?”
“Yeah, but I think we can do it. Our offense is looking tight and Coach has us practicing plays until we’re blue in the face.”
“Good, that’s good. Xander will be at Katie’s after school Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, we have appointments.”