The silence is almost deafening as all talk among the patrons stops. I didn’t expect the douchebag to admit what he said, and he’s probably drunk. Knowing that I won’t get any satisfaction, I tug Sophie, and we push through the crowd and out the door.
“Sorry about that,” I apologize for my outburst. “I was an asshole.”
Sophie tucks her hand into the crook of my elbow and giggles. “You are most certainly not the asshole. But whoever said that… you sure put them in their place.”
I snicker, because it was kind of fun seeing all the stricken looks when they were reminded that civility goes a long way in the face of tragedy.
Sophie and I walk through the parking lot. When I got here, it was almost full, and I had to park my Escalade on the outskirts. It’s a beautiful evening, and I don’t hate that Sophie is still tucked in close to my side.
When we’re almost to where I parked, two men step out from between two cars, startling Sophie. They’re just patrons, heading into The Sneaky Saguaro, but she doesn’t recognize that. She recognizes potential danger in a parking lot and lets out a frightened yelp.
I hold her around the waist. “It’s okay. Those guys are just going inside the restaurant.”
My words settle Sophie and she curses under her breath, “What the fuck is wrong with me?”
I take her by the shoulders to turn her toward me. Her head is bowed and I demand that she give me her attention. “Look at me, Sophie.”
With obvious reluctance, she slowly lifts her eyes to mine.
Touching my knuckles under her chin so she can’t look away, I say, “There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re working through trauma and how to deal with it. Rather than get down on yourself for that startling you, let’s celebrate the fucking amazing fact that you flew on a plane to Arizona and essentially returned to the place of your trauma. You’re doing great, Sophie. Give yourself a break.”
She smiles, but it’s laced with bitterness. “I’m sorry—”
“No apologies,” I chastise as I let my hand fall away from her face.
She tips her head. “You’re always so bossy.”
Laughing, I bend in closer. “Want to know a secret?”
Her eyes widen and she nods.
“I like bossing you around.”
It was meant in jest. Something to make her laugh because I do tend to be vocal about my reassurances and often tell her how she should feel.
But I didn’t mean to lace innuendo within those last words.
I like bossing you around.
A small breath escapes from Sophie as she tips her head back. Her eyes search mine, and I can’t help but notice how close our mouths are.
I’m stunned beyond measure when Sophie goes on tiptoes and brushes her mouth against mine.
I’m so surprised, I involuntarily jerk back from her, which causes her to scramble away from me.
“Oh my God,” she gasps, a look of horror on her face. “I’m so sorry. It must be the beer making me do stupid things.”
I reach for her, shaking my head. I want to tell her there’s nothing to apologize for, but she’s so embarrassed that she scuttles back even farther.
“Sophie,” I say in a gentle tone, “don’t back away from me.”
She shakes her head and holds out her hands, rambling her apologies. “I swear I didn’t mean to do that. I would never press myself on you like that. I must’ve had too much to drink. And well, I mean… your mouth was right there. And my mouth was right there. And you know how it is when you have alcohol, you do stupid things. And I swear, Baden, I would never do anything to jeopardize our friendship. It’s too important to me. I don’t want to lose it.”
“Sophie,” I snap, my tone slightly harsh to stop her monologue. I nab her upper arms and pull her in closer.
Once again, I bend down, not to kiss her, but so she is forced to look in my eyes. “There is nothing you could ever do that would jeopardize our friendship. Do you understand that?”
She stares wide-eyed but doesn’t tell me she understands because she doesn’t believe me.
“You will always be my friend. You will never be less than that.”
To myself, I think, she could be more. When her lips touched mine, a sizzle burned through my entire body. It was the barest of touches, but because it was Sophie, I felt the impact straight through to my gut. She and I could definitely be more, but she does make a good point.
She’s had several beers. Her inhibitions are loosened, and I know as well as she does that we all do things under the influence that we would never have done sober.
I don’t know if Sophie is attracted to me.
Do I hope she is?
I think I do.