A dozen emotions zap me all at once, but the biggest is relief that out of everything Baden just said, what I took from it is that Jenna isn’t a romantic interest.
A little sister is what he likened her to.
Crap… the part of my heart that might be hoping for something more than a friendship with Baden flutters again. I try to tell myself to stop it, but it won’t die down. He’s sparked something inside me, and I can’t seem to quell it.
“What about you?” Baden asks after a bite of potato. “How’s the job hunt going?”
“Crappy,” I mutter as I stab an asparagus tip. I wave it for punctuation. “I applied for a few remote jobs, but I’m not hopeful. They’re in areas I have no real experience.”
“You need to expand your horizons,” Baden says. “Maybe look for something that’s close to the house to help you get out a bit.”
I frown, pushing my food around before lifting my eyes to meet his. “It’s more than just me being afraid to go out. I actually know I have to do that, and maybe a new job is just the thing to make me do it. But… I honestly don’t know what I want to do.”
Baden goes still, pausing his knife and fork that have been working diligently on his meal. “What did you study in college? What were your dreams?”
I flush, hesitating before finally admitting, “I didn’t really have any. I just wanted to get a degree, and at the time I was in college, I was really into literature. Still am, for that matter, but I have an English degree I really don’t know what to do with.”
“Teacher?” he asks.
I shake my head. “I’ve thought about it, but I don’t think I’m cut out for it. People who can teach are special, and I don’t think I have the passion for it.”
“Librarian?”
I shrug, spearing a potato. “Doesn’t speak to me. I mean… it could be cool, but it’s not something I’ve been dreaming about.”
Baden considers that and then resumes cutting his prime rib. “Okay, if you could have any career in the entire world at the snap of your fingers, without regard to experience, education, location, money… what would that career be?”
Not sure it’s really a dream, but I answer without hesitation. “An interior designer. But not the kind who just goes in and suggests wallpaper samples and furniture upholstery. More like going in to old houses and helping refinish things like flooring and crown moldings. Or updating spaces in old houses that manage to marry the historical period of the house with modern conveniences and materials. Like, I’d love to remodel an old Victorian or something.”
Baden stares at me and says nothing. He does it for so long, I get hot under the collar.
“What?” I demand to know his thoughts.
“That’s a dream,” he says emphatically. “You have a dream of what you want to do, and you didn’t even know it, did you?”
My brows knit in consternation. “I mean… it’s a ludicrous dream.”
“Why?”
I roll my eyes. “Because I have an English degree.”
“What the hell does that matter?”
“I don’t have an interior design degree? I don’t know how to do all the things I’d want to do, even if I didn’t have that type of degree.”
“So go back to school. Get an apprenticeship. Figure it out.”
I set my fork and knife down, lean back in my chair, and cross my arms protectively. “I just go back to school? Just figure out how to do it?”
Baden’s eyes hold me with a boldness that says he’s right about this. “Isn’t that what people do when they figure out what they want to do in life? They learn how to do it?”
“But—”
“No buts,” he growls affectionately. “Tomorrow, get online and figure out what you need to do to accomplish your dreams.”
I could argue with him. I could tell him there’s no way I can go back to school as I’m still paying for that English degree. Or that since I have bills to pay now, learning a new career would be a luxury.
I don’t bother because I know Baden would find a way to talk around each problem and would push me harder toward this. So I make a half-hearted promise to look into it.
Before he can push me further, I change the subject. “Today I spent some time looking at houses and condos based on the parameters you gave me. I came up with six that look promising. I’ll email them to you.”
Last night before Baden went to bed, we discussed what type of abode he was interested in. He gave me his price range and allowable distance from the arena, and told me he didn’t care if it was a house or a condo. I actually found way more than six potentials, but I narrowed it down to ones that were the most perfect given their age and amenities.