And what difference did it make, anyway?
He wasn’t going to be interested in her feelings. Alessio Capelli didn’t do feelings. She knew that. He was famous for it, wasn’t he? No ties. No emotions.
And she wasn’t going to allow herself to mind that he hadn’t once mentioned what had happened the previous night—hadn’t even kissed her.
For a brief, disturbing moment her mind flickered back to the intensity of what they’d shared and she clutched the rail more tightly.
‘Lindsay, come here.’ His cool command sent shivers of awareness down her spine and for a moment she hesitated. She wasn’t actually sure that she had the energy to keep up the pretence of normality. But if she didn’t go—
Forcing herself to think neutral thoughts, she turned and strolled to the back of the boat.
He handled the boat with confidence and a sure touch, dark glasses shading his eyes from the harsh rays of the sun. ‘You need to wear a hat. You’ll burn.’ Reaching down, he picked up a hat and slipped it onto her head in a decisive gesture. ‘You’re very fair. You need to be careful.’
Careful?
Lindsay swallowed back the hysterical laugh that almost burst from her throat. Careful? If she’d wanted to be careful, then she wouldn’t have spent the night the way she had. What they’d shared hadn’t been remotely careful. It had been reckless, wild and totally abandoned. ‘I thought you were encouraging me to take more risks.’
‘Sunburn is a certainty,’ he drawled, ‘not a risk. And it’s painful.’
Suddenly she was grateful for the hat. She pulled at the wide brim, shading her features and, hopefully, her facial expression. And she wondered what had made her naïvely think that she’d be able to share one incredible night with him and then walk away as if nothing had happened.
Unable to stop herself, Lindsay risked a sideways glance at him and immediately her eyes collided with his penetrating dark gaze. Her insides tumbled, flames licked through her body and she turned away quickly, knowing that she’d embarrass herself if she looked at him any longer.
No clinging, no sighing and no long, desperate looks, she reminded herself desperately. She’d known it was just for one night.
But when they’d finally connected in the most intimate way possible, she’d wanted it to be for always.
And she knew it was because she was in love with him. She’d known it the moment she awoke and found herself in his arms. For her, it had always been so much more than chemistry. Perhaps she’d always been a little bit in love with him, ever since that evening when he’d come to her rescue.
So in the end, she’d been true to herself, hadn’t she?
Her choice had been sex with love, even though that love wasn’t returned.
Love.
Horrified that he’d see something in her expression, Lindsay kept her eyes fixed on the horizon, desperately hoping that his expertise with women didn’t run to reading minds.
‘Are we going to talk about this?’ His voice was a deep, dark drawl and she kept her eyes on the water, trying to forget the way he’d sounded when he’d breathed soft words of encouragement to her during the night.
‘Talk about what?’
‘Oh, well, let’s see—perhaps because you spent the night having wild sex with a wicked divorce lawyer who you don’t approve of. That might give most women pause for thought.’
‘I made my choice.’
‘You made your choice when you were in an extremely emotional state. Those circumstances frequently lead to regret.’
‘I don’t regret anything.’ And it was true. She would have done the same thing again. Yes, she’d been upset. Confused. Emotional. But for that one night she’d also been—curious. She’d wanted to give in to the amazing chemistry between them and see where it led.
She’d wanted to have that one moment. And now, for the first time, she understood what made other people act in a reckless fashion.
She really understood.
Was this how her mother had felt?
Lindsay stood still, thinking about her mother as a woman for the first time. A sexual woman.
‘Lindsay?’