They’d made love in his office.
With a moan of disbelief she tried to draw away from him but he held her, his face buried in her neck as he breathed in her scent. Finally he lifted his head and his eyes met hers.
‘Lara—’
‘Don’t say anything.’ She didn’t want him to say anything because words could only spoil the perfection of what they’d just shared.
He withdrew from her gently and reached down to retrieve her clothes. With gentle hands he replaced her bra and slipped her top over her head. ‘Are you sorry?’
She slid her legs into her trousers and pushed her hair away from her face. ‘How could I be sorry?’ She spoke in a whisper even though they were alone in his office. ‘It was perfect.’
‘Yes. It was.’ His voice was deep. ‘That’s why I thought you might be sorry.’
So it had been perfect for him, too.
Impulsively she turned to him, overwhelmed by emotion that she didn’t understand. ‘What if I didn’t go travelling? What if I just visited my brother and then came straight home? I could look after the girls and we could—’
‘Don’t.’He groaned the words against her mouth. ‘Don’t say that.You know that isn’t an option. The girls can’t cope with any more changes. Their lives need to be stable and predictable.’
‘But I love the girls. We could make it work.’ Consumed by a misery that she didn’t understand, she looked at him. ‘We have something special, Christian.’
‘Yes.’ He stilled. ‘But you have no idea how traumatised they were when their mother left. It just isn’t something I can risk again.’
‘I wouldn’t hurt them, Christian.’
‘Not intentionally, no.’ He moved away from her as if he didn’t trust himself not to touch her again. ‘But I don’t intend to make a habit of having women walking in and out of their lives.’
Was it possible to experience perfect happiness and the depths of misery almost simultaneously? ‘So that’s it?’
He ran a hand over his face and turned away from her. ‘It has to be.’ His tone was bleak. ‘It has to be, Lara.’
CHAPTER TEN
‘I CAN’T see her,’ Chloe whispered as the three of them craned their necks to see Aggie on the stage. ‘She’s supposed to come on after the Kings. Where is she?’
Christian stared at the stage and tried to control his reaction to Lara, who was sitting right beside him. She was avoiding his gaze but he knew that she was every bit as aware of him as he was of her.
Their moment of passion had stripped back his self-control and he just wanted to haul her into a dark cave and keep her there.
‘Oh, my goodness, they all look so sweet,’ Lara murmured as a line of young children shuffled onto the stage in various muddy-coloured robes. ‘I’ve never actually been to a school nativity play before. It’s amazing.’
She was amazing, he thought, coming to watch his daughter in her nativity play. Especially after what had happened between them.
He wouldn’t have blamed her if she’d packed her bags and walked away.
But she hadn’t done that. She’d just carried on with her life—working and helping him with the girls. She was a little paler and possibly a little less bouncy, but she was still Lara.
‘Dad!’ Chloe nudged him. ‘You’re not concentrating.’
Forcing his mind away from Lara, Christian scanned the line of children on the stage. ‘Why are they all wearing stripy teatowels on their heads?’
‘Because they’re shepherds.’ Smiling, Lara glanced towards him, but her smile faded almost instantly.
‘I love the woolly sheep,’ Chloe murmured, and Lara dragged her eyes away from his and back to the stage.
Christian felt a sudden rush of tension engulf him. They couldn’t even behave naturally anymore.
‘I can see Aggie.’ Lara moved slightly in her seat and waved her hand.