The fragile shoots of their new relationship froze and snapped.
If Posy had hoped that the evening had signaled a fresh start and a new closeness with her sister, that hope was dead now.
“Hannah—I was just trying to—”
“To what? To interfere, like you all do? Is Hannah seeing anyone? When is Hannah going to settle down? What business is it of yours? So much for being the barrier between me and the rest of the world. Or were you trying to ruin my life?”
“No.”
I love you. You’re my sister. I’ve messed up and I’m so sorry.
Posy didn’t know what to say. And she had a feeling that nothing she said was going to make a difference.
23
Hannah
The front door opened and her whole family was crowded there. Suzanne and Stewart, with Melly and Ruby peeping around their legs. No doubt Jason was hovering in the background, too.
Flanked by her sisters, Hannah felt as if everyone was looking at her, waiting for her reaction.
Her reaction was one of panic.
She hadn’t had time to get used to the idea of being pregnant. She hadn’t worked out how she was going to handle it. She didn’t know what part Adam would play, or if he wanted to play any part at all, and she didn’t know how to handle that, either.
She certainly wasn’t good with men showing up on her doorstep unannounced.
She’d planned on taking the few weeks over Christmas to think hard about what she wanted and how much of a risk she was prepared to take. Her intention had been to come up with a plan and then execute it carefully, step by step. Instead she felt as if she was being swept along by a tidal wave, gasping and drowning, unable to save herself.
How could Posy have done such a thing?
And what had possessed Adam to show up here without speaking to her first? Why wasn’t he in the Caribbean as planned?
Like it or not, he was here, and she had no choice but to invite him in and accept the overenthusiastic scrutiny of her family. She could almost feel their minds working. They’d be asking themselves questions. They’d be asking her questions.
She felt as if his arrival had somehow exposed her.
Digging deep to find the part of her that used to feel in control of her life, she walked
toward Adam, trying hard not to slip on the icy surface.
Posy reached out to her. “Do you want to take my—”
“No, I don’t.” She wasn’t holding on to anyone. The only person you could really trust in the world was yourself. And fortunately, this time, she didn’t let herself down. Her feet planted firmly and she didn’t slip. “This is a surprise.” She could see from the wary look in his eyes that he could tell it wasn’t necessarily a good one.
“I took a chance.”
And that, she thought, was the difference between them.
Hannah didn’t take chances. She never leaped unless she knew her landing was secure. She never started a journey without knowing her destination.
The cab drove off and she noticed the small suitcase by Adam’s feet.
“Come inside!” Suzanne opened the door wider. “You must all be freezing.”
Hannah didn’t want to step inside. She wanted to run. She didn’t care if she slipped on the ice and fell flat on her face.
It was only as she stepped through the door that she remembered Luke and the reason they’d gone to the pub in the first place. It seemed like a lifetime ago that she’d been talking with her sisters. She’d felt lighter than she could ever remember being. That part of her that had been closed for a long time had begun to open up. After Beth had revealed her own insecurities, Hannah had been on the verge of telling her about the baby and admitting her own feelings of vulnerability and inadequacy. She’d considered asking Beth’s advice.