He was silent for a moment, a muscle working in his lean jaw. When he finally spoke his voice was slightly hoarse. ‘What are you doing here, Helen?’
‘Looking for you.’ She closed her eyes and breathed in the air. ‘It’s lovely here.’
‘Helen…’
He looked so remote, so unlike Oliver, that for a moment her courage faltered. And then she remembered eve
rything that Tom had told her and that gave her the strength she needed.
‘Actually, I’m here because I need to ask you a question. If I ask you a question, will you give me an honest answer, Oliver?’
His expression was wary. ‘That depends on the question.’
As a response it was less than encouraging, but she ploughed on anyway. This time she wasn’t going to give up until she’d told him how she felt.
‘Do you love me, Oliver?’
He flinched as though she’d struck him and dragged his eyes away from hers, staring out across the mountains. ‘What sort of a question is that?’
‘An important one.’ Suddenly her hands were shaking and she had butterflies in her stomach, but still she carried on, trying not to be put off by the fact that his hands were thrust firmly in his pockets. ‘Last night you told me you loved me. I want to know if you meant it, or if it was something you say to every woman you make love to.’
He didn’t move and he didn’t look at her. ‘I don’t say it to every woman.’
‘So, is that a yes?’
His hard jaw tensed and for a moment she thought he wasn’t going to answer.
Then he stirred. ‘Yes. I love you. Now what?’
Her heart lifted but he still didn’t turn to face her so she walked around until she was in front of him.
‘Now you can ask me a question.’
Finally his eyes met hers. ‘Helen, I—’
‘I expect you want to ask me about David,’ she said quietly, ‘so I’ll just tell you anyway. I don’t love David, Oliver. I’m not going with David. In fact, I should probably tell you that I intend to settle down in the Lake District with my family.’
Oliver was silent for a long moment, his blue eyes fixed on hers, his expression unreadable. Then he cleared his throat. ‘Your family?’
‘That’s right.’ She was taking a huge risk but she’d decided that it was worth it. ‘For a while there’s just going to be me and the man I love, but pretty soon I’m sure we’ll have babies because I’m dying to be a mother and he’s going to be a great dad. And if we’re going to have lots of children we need to make a start.’
There was a long, pulsing silence and Oliver finally stirred. ‘This man you love…’
‘Yes?’
‘He doesn’t live in London?’
She gave a smile. ‘He’d hate living in London. The man I love was born to live in the mountains. They’re part of who he is.’
‘Sounds a pretty weird choice of partner to me.’ Oliver’s voice was hoarse and he still hadn’t touched her. ‘Why would a London girl like you love a man like that?’
‘You want to know what I love about him?’ Helen’s voice was soft. ‘I love the fact that he cares so much about everyone. I love the fact he cares enough to see patients on his day off and pretend his roof needs fixing just so that he can keep an eye on a friend of his sister’s that he doesn’t even know.’
Oliver sucked in a breath. ‘Helen—’
‘I love the way he laughs all the time and I love the way he kisses.’ Helen paused, digging her nails into her palms. ‘And I love the way he pretends that he doesn’t love me so that I can leave without feeling guilty.’
Oliver’s eyes locked on hers. ‘But you don’t want to leave?’