“She told me once that if it hadn’t been for Mia, she’d probably still be living with him. Mia spurred her into leaving. But she never had the courage to give a statement to the police before now.”
“She’s a great mother.” Frankie looked out the window of the cab. “We’re going the wrong way. This isn’t home.”
“I’m not ready to go home yet. There are things I need to say to you and things I want to hear you say to me. And I don’t want to do it in the chaos of the house. I love our friends, but today I want you to myself.”
“What about Claws?”
“Eva texted when you were in the emergency room. The vet has given her some antibiotics and we’re to watch for infection, but they didn’t seem too worried. Eva has agreed to keep her in her apartment until we’re home.”
“Claws and I can heal together.” Frankie glanced out the window again, nerves fluttering in her belly. She’d had a plan, but that had all gone awry thanks to Eddy. Now she didn’t know what to do. When was the best time to say what she wanted to say? “So where are we going?”
“Central Park?” Matt looked at her leg, the bandage exposed by the dress. “Will you be able to walk?”
“Of course.” She settled back in her seat and watched New York slide past her, store windows, jostling crowds, people jabbering into cell phones. A million lives blended into a small island. Small, and yet big in so many ways.
The cab dropped them off near Columbus Circle and they walked toward Bow Bridge along winding paths, past small children playing baseball and families with strollers.
It was a perfect late-September day.
“Another month and the ice rink will be back.” She slid her arm through Matt’s. “We should go. All of us.”
“You hate ice-skating.”
“I know, but it’s Eva’s favorite thing. Last Christmas was so hard for her. I want this one to be better. Shall we suggest it?”
“That depends. Will you still love me if I land on my butt?” They’d reached the bridge and they both stopped, as if subconsciously they’d both been aiming for the same destination.
Matt leaned on the graceful arch and looked over the lake.
Frankie glanced at him and then at the water, watching the reflections play across the surface.
“Nothing will stop me loving you.” The words came naturally and when he turned to her she continued in a rush. “Before you say anything, there are some things I need to tell you. I spoke to my mother this morning.”
“She called you again?”
“No. I called her. I asked her to meet me. We talked. Properly. In fact, I think it’s probably the first honest conversation we’ve ever had.”
“How honest?”
“I told her about my dad.”
“All of it?”
“All of it. Turned out that wasn’t his first affair. He’d had others. He even had one when she was expecting me.” It still hadn’t really sunk in. “She forgave him. But she had no idea that I knew about the last affair.”
“Do you feel better now that she knows?”
“Yes, but what really helped was telling you.” She paused, wondering how she could make him understand. “I’m not like Eva. I don’t find it easy talking to people about emotional things. I guess it makes me feel too vulnerable. Naked.”
“I like you naked.”
“When my mother arrived, and she was so upset, it was like being catapulted back in time. I felt as if everything was unraveling. As if suddenly I was unlearning everything I’d learned.” She leaned her head against Matt’s shoulder. “I know I hurt you, and I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.” He curved his arm around her and pulled her close. “Your mother spent her whole visit giving you a bunch of reasons not to fall in love, reminding you of all the reasons you’ve spent your life avoiding it, so it was hardly surprising you started backing off. I should have given you space instead of pressing you. My timing couldn’t have been worse.”
“I shouldn’t have let her words affect me the way they did. I do trust what we have. It’s special, and real and the most powerful thing I’ve ever known.” Her throat felt thick. “Back there in the apartment you said that I didn’t need you for anything, but that isn’t true. I need you for so many things, Matt. You’re the only person I’ve ever been truly myself with. I love every single moment we spend together, whether we’re up on a roof terrace hauling paving stones, or naked in bed. With you, I’m allowed to be me.”
“And I love who you are.” He slid his fingers into her hair. “I thought I knew you so well, and then that day in the apartment when you forgot to wear your glasses, I realized I didn’t know you at all. And the more I learned about you, the harder and deeper I fell. I thought I was in control of everything, and before I knew what was happening I was out of my depth. There was so much I wanted to say to you, but I was afraid I’d send you running. I knew you had feelings for me, I just didn’t know if they were as strong as mine. I could see that your mother had put questions in your mind, and instead of leaving you to work it out, I waded in clumsily. I really thought I’d lost you. I thought you didn’t trust me.”