He stood for a moment and then he turned. His ice-blue eyes were serious and there was no hint of a smile on his mouth. ‘I don’t think so.’
Her heart plummeted. ‘I’ll take off my bra and knickers this time, if that would swing your decision.’
‘No, Flora.’ His voice held none of its usual mockery. ‘I don’t think that’s a good idea.’
‘Oh. I thought you—I thought we might—’ She broke off, not knowing what to say. ‘Of course. Sorry. I understand.’
Had he guessed how she felt about him?
Probably. Sooner or later it happened to every woman who spent time with him, she was sure of that.
He’d guessed, and now he was running for cover. She’d always known this moment would come, but that didn’t make it any easier. In fact, the pain was so overwhelming that she turned away, not wanting to embarrass herself or him by saying anything else.
‘This thing between us has to end, Flora. Do you understand?’ He closed his hands around her upper arms and spun her towards him, his eyes fierce as he stared into her face. ‘Do you?’
Even though she’d sensed this moment was coming, she felt totally unprepared. ‘Yes,’ she croaked. ‘I understand, Conner.’ If he didn’t want to be with her, she couldn’t change that. And she didn’t want to make him feel bad by showing how much she was hurting. ‘We’ve been together for over a month.’ She gave a tremulous smile. ‘That’s probably a record for you. Don’t feel guilty. We had a great time. I had a great time.’
He gritted his teeth. ‘Don’t cry.’
‘I’m not going to cry.’ At least, not until she was on her own.
And she wasn’t going to admit that she loved him either, because that would just make the whole situation even more embarrassing for both of them.
And what was the point of it?
His fingers tig
htened on her arms. ‘We never should have started this,’ he said hoarsely. ‘I never should have started it.’
‘You didn’t. I did. And, Conner, you’re hurting me.’
‘Sorry.’ He released her instantly and let out a breath. ‘Sorry.’
‘You don’t have to look so tormented.’ Though it took all her courage, she was determined to say it. ‘You never promised me anything. You haven’t done anything wrong. It was just a bit of fun.’
‘And will it be fun when the locals work out who the woman is that I’ve been seeing? No, it won’t.’ His tone impatient and full of self-loathing, he turned away from her and strode towards the window. ‘I can’t believe I thought for a moment we could have a secret affair on an island like Glenmore. I’d forgotten what the place was like. You can’t sneeze without someone counting the microbes.’
‘I didn’t think you cared what people say about you.’
‘I don’t. But I care about what people say about you. I saw your face, Flora,’ he said roughly, ‘when you were looking at that baby. You watched Evanna and Logan and you wanted what they have. Admit it.’
‘I admit it,’ she said simply. ‘Who wouldn’t want that, Logan? Someone to love. A family. Isn’t it what everyone wants?’
His hands dropped to his sides. ‘I can’t do this. I’m sorry, Flora.’
‘Is this because of Evanna and Logan?’ Suddenly she couldn’t just let him walk away. ‘Talk to me, Conner. I know you’re upset about what just happened and I can imagine it must be very hard seeing all that family stuff when your own family life was so desperately bad, but—’
He jerked away from her and strode towards the door. ‘Enough.’
‘Please, talk to me, Conner. I can see you’re upset. Come over later. Even if we don’t…’ She stumbled over the words. ‘If we’re not still together, I’m still your friend.’
He paused with his hand on the door and then he turned slowly. And then he looked at her and his eyes were bleak and empty. ‘People are already talking.’
‘I know.’
‘They’re going to find out, Flora,’ he said roughly. ‘Nods. Winks. Whispers. Everyone wondering what a girl like you is doing with a man like me. And you’ll hate it. You hate being the focus of attention. Take that first night—you were mortified when Jim and the others turned up on the beach.’
‘Well of course I was.’ She defended herself. ‘I was in my underwear!’