She eagerly obeys and I follow, yanking off her delicate panties and tossing them on the floor. I want her so much, I’m tempted to leave the bra on, but the idea of not seeing her bare breasts gives me enough patience to reach behind her and unhook it. I take just enough time to peel it off before burying myself inside her.
It’s after we’ve both finished that I get what I need, though. The sight of her excites me and I wanted to fuck her until she came as hard for me as she does for Seb, but she’s so affectionate afterward, lying in my embrace, fitted snugly against my chest with her head resting on my bicep. This is what I craved when I was driving over here. Her fingertip traces little shapes on my chest. Her leg is hooked over my thigh to keep me close. Her hair’s a fucking mess.
“What are you smirking at?” she asks, poking me in the chest.
“I fucked up your hair,” I tell her.
“Worth it,” she assures me with a playful wink. When I don’t say anything back, she lets the moment pass, but keeps her watchful blue eyes on me. “You wanna tell me what’s wrong? It seemed like something had you upset.”
I really don’t want to bring up my not-quite ex-wife, especially right now, but I don’t want to lie to her, either. “I had to meet with Ashley today. Well, I didn’t have to. My lawyer actually told me not to. But she’s still pulling all kinds of shit to try to stall the divorce and I thought maybe if I talked to her face
to face she’d stop it.”
The corner of Moira’s mouth tugs up with little humor. “Didn’t go as planned?”
I shake my head, tracing the curve of her shoulder. “Not quite.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right. It’ll get done, I just… I just wish it wasn’t taking so long. I want that part of my life over. I want that mistake filed away and dealt with.”
Moira nods her understanding. “What did she say that upset you so much?”
“I wasn’t upset,” I say, defensively. “I was annoyed.”
“Fine,” she says, easily. “That annoyed you so much, then.”
“Just bullshit. How she’s sorry for what she did—still blames me, though, of course—and it was a mistake. How she wants to start fresh. Just a bunch of shit to try to buy fucking time so she can talk me out of it.”
I hate everything Ashley said today—especially the nice stuff. She makes me feel like an asshole for not wanting to try, but I did want to try. I did try. I tried for years with that woman, and all it got me was cheated on and made a fucking fool of.
I’m lost in my own thoughts so it takes me a minute to realize Moira has gone silent. I wouldn’t be too worried about it, except her brow is furrowed, her finger has stopped tracing shapes on my skin, and she’s staring vacantly at the wall of my chest in front of her.
“What’s going on up there?” I ask, lightly tapping her temple.
She looks regretful, but she attempts a smile. “I was just thinking.”
“About what?”
Her big eyes meet mine. “Is there any part of you that wants to?”
I can’t believe she’d even ask that after I fled Ashley’s presence to come see her. A little doubt in my mind whispers that she’s thinking about that because she wants it to be true. After all, if this was just some fantasy I had to fuck Seb’s untouchable wife, I’ve more than sated it. I’ve fucked her myself, fucked her with him—I’ve fucked every hole, fucked her a dozen times now. If I only needed to get her out of my system, if I only needed to possess her because she was some ideal to me, I’ve already done that.
If that’s all it is, maybe I could go back to my unfaithful wife with my pride avenged, having fucked my dream girl every which way. Maybe when memories of Ashley’s infidelity crossed my mind, memories of Moira desperately gripping Seb’s bed sheets and coming for me would be enough to soothe me. Maybe now I could get on with my life, be with someone without constantly comparing them to Moira, our relationship to hers.
Is that what Moira hopes? Is she waiting for me to get her out of my system so she can have her life back? Is she just trying to fuck me until I get bored with her?
“Do you like being with both of us better than just being with Seb?” I ask her.
Moira frowns, since that’s not an answer to the question she just asked at all. “In some ways, yes. I don’t like to compare, though. You’re evading my question.”
“I’m not evading your question,” I deny.
“It’s okay if you do,” she assures me. “I think that would be natural, to have doubts. Especially after seeing her today. You were married to her for years, and you haven’t seen her in person recently. Is that what happened? You can tell me, I won’t be offended.”
“I don’t want to be with Ashley,” I snap.
Moira’s eyes widen, surprised at the sharpness of my tone. “Okay,” she says. “I was just asking. For the record, I don’t think you should either. I was just trying to be an unbiased ear in case you needed one.”