“Yeah, it’s a lot different after hours.” I lead her out onto the field that’s lit only from the lights of the surrounding city and the night sky. I don’t stop until we reach the outfield.
“Wow,” she whispers, looking up at the stars.
Her head is tilted toward the night sky, and her hair is cascading down her back. I step close, invading her space. When she lifts her head, our eyes collide and our breaths mingle. “You’re beautiful, Larissa.” My hand reaches up to cup her cheek. Her hand grips my wrist, and I hesitate just long enough for her to push me away. She doesn’t. Closing the space between us, I press my lips to hers. I have to fight to keep it slow, to not devour her.
“East,” she whimpers.
“Yeah, baby?”
“What are we doing?”
“I’m kissing you.” I trail my lips down her jaw.
“But why?”
“Because I can’t not kiss you,” I say, kissing her just below her ear before pulling away. Sitting down in the middle of the outfield, I tug on her hand and motion for her to sit between my legs. She hesitates but eventually takes her place nestled between my thighs, her back to my chest. Immediately, I wrap my arms around her and bury my face in her neck. “Tell me what I have to do?”
“What do you mean?”
“What do I have to do for you to give us… give this a chance?”
“Why me?”
“Besides the fact that my body prickles with awareness anytime you’re near? How about the fact that you’re not impressed with my career or the fact that I’m a Monroe? You make me work for your attention. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the day I met you.”
“I’m a single mom, busting my ass to make ends meet. You don’t need that baggage.”
“Can I tell you a story?”
“Yeah,” she whispers.
“One day there was this ten-year-old little boy name Easton. His father was a bad guy, a crooked cop, heavy into drugs who no longer wanted his family. Easton and his mom started over on their own. They were doing fine on their own, but one day that all changed. A man, a good man, fell in love with his mother, fell in love with him. That man changed their lives for the better. He loved them both as if they’d always been his. He brought them a family—brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins, and grandparents. Suddenly Easton and his mom were more than doing fine. They were great.”
“Is that true?”
“Yeah, my dad, he adopted me after he and my mom got married. He’s never once treated me as if I’m not his biological son. His family welcomed me and my mom with open arms.” I tighten my hold on her. “That little girl is a part of you, Larissa. I know this is a package deal. I wouldn’t pursue this otherwise.”
“Your father is a good man.”
“The best,” I say, before kissing the top of her head. “I know this is all fast, but I’ve never wanted someone the way I want you. Not just so I can fuck you.” She tenses in my arms, and I rush to finish what I was saying. “It’s more than that. I just like being around you. Your smile lights me up inside. And as far as your little princess, she’s just that, an adorable little girl who I would be honored to get to spend more time with.”
“I’m worried she’s going to get attached to you and she’s going to get her heart broken.” A pang of longing hits me, causing an ache deep in my chest. I want her to get attached to me. I want to be engrained in their lives. I know I have to prove it to her, but no way would I break either of their hearts. In fact, it would be quite the opposite if she were to let me in and then push me back out of their lives. My heart would be the one broken.
“I won’t hurt either of you. I know what’s at stake here. I know it’s more than just about me and how much I want you. I know what it means to date a single mom; I’ve lived it.”
“Yet you’re still here.”
“I’m still here. This is where I want to be.” Her body relaxes against me, and I smile in silent victory that maybe, just maybe, I’m getting through to her. “Tell me about her dad.”
Rather than stiffening in my arms like I expected her to at the mention of her husband, I’m relieved when she presses even closer to me. “Steve and I were high school sweethearts. We had everything all planned out. We’d both work and save up money. He would go to the police academy first since it was a shorter program. Once he got a full-time job, I’d start on my degree. We were so young and a lot alike. He was a foster kid, and well, all I had was my mom. The day we found out I was pregnant, we were thrilled but scared out of our minds. He left for work that same morning, and I never saw him again. A few hours later, there was a uniformed officer at our front door telling me he was killed in the line of duty.”
“I don’t know what to say to that,” I confess. Although it would mean we were not here in this moment, I wish I could somehow change the outcome for her. For both of them. Then it hits me. I can change it now. Maybe that’s why I met her, maybe that’s the pull I feel toward them.
“Yeah, I get that a lot. Steve had life insurance, but it was small. We were young and thought we had time. He was a rookie so his pension and benefits, although helpful, weren’t much. It was enough to cover the funeral and get caught up on the bills I was behind on from not being able to… function for a few weeks after his death. Eventually, I knew I had to start living again, for our baby. I gave her his middle name, Paisley Gray. I wanted her to always know she had that part of him. I don’t know what I would have done without my mom. She’s helped me so much, watching her on days she doesn’t have to work.”
“What about the other times?”
“She goes to daycare.”