Protect my house. Do not allow anyone who means me harm to set foot on my property.
The next step is the one I struggle most with: setting the boundary. Imagining a circle surrounding the house is one thing, but trying to figure out where to set the boundary is what trips me up. I should include the barn, of course, but what about the pasture? The horses and donkeys are out there daily, and I’m out there with them too. But, even in the book, it warns not to attempt to cast a circle too big unless you are well-versed with magic, which I definitely am not. Not yet at least.
The house and the barn. That’s more than enough for me to handle right now. Nodding to myself, I imagine bright light burning before me, sparking and fizzling as it forms a circle around my property. Waiting for the split second where I feel magic pulse through me, I open my eyes and read from the book.
“Ego autem iste circulus magicae sunt et feceris me a malitia,” I whisper. “Ego autem iste circulus magicae sunt et feceris me a malitia.” Something else pulses through me, and a beautiful, translucent blue light glows in a circle around the property for only half a second before fading to nothing. My eyes widen and my jaw actually drops. That’s the first time I’ve actually seen a spell like this work, and holy shit, it was amazing.
“Well then,” I say to myself. “I take it the circle is effective.”
Feeling much, much better, I gather everything up and go back inside. A sense of relief hits me as soon as I close and lock the front door. Crossing the house, I look out the kitchen window at the barn. All seems quiet and still, and I ensure that things are actually good by checking the security camera footage and see that all is good in the barn.
I get hit in the gut with guilt and grief when I see Sundance lazily finishing his hay. I still haven’t fully processed what happened and, in the back of my mind, I know I’m compartmentalizing—and not in a good way.
I don’t blame myself for Leslie’s death. I blame Aunt Estelle.
She bound my powers, kept my true identity from myself, and wiped my memory instead of teaching me how to do magic. Instead of running away and having no fucking clue how to defend myself, I could have fought the demons head-on. I could have cast protection spells on everyone I care about instead of sitting back and watching them get attacked.
I watch the blurry night-vision footage of the barn for another few seconds before putting my phone down. The house is as safe as it can be for the night, and I’m starting to feel tired again. Getting a restful night’s sleep is farfetched even for me to hope for, but, at the very least, I can go back into my bedroom, turn the TV on, and doze off until the sun rises and the light of the day makes me feel safe.
“Want to snuggle again?” I ask Romeo when I get back into my room. He’s still fast asleep on my bed, stretched out this time and looking a little dead. I climb under the covers and pick him up, slowly moving him onto my chest so I don’t disturb him. He stretches but goes right back to sleep. “If only it were that easy,” I huff and turn the TV back on, knowing I’ll be lucky to get even a few hours of sleep tonight.
I wake up a little after seven a.m. Since we moved here, I’ve been slowly adjusting the horses’ feeding schedule to move to eight-thirty so I can allow myself a little more time to sleep in. We’re having a new barn built but construction won’t start until the spring. And I’m putting in automatic hay feeders so I can be lazy in the mornings.
Rolling over, I try to get comfy and fall back asleep, but my damn mind won’t shut off and let me return to the peaceful oblivion of dreams. Sighing, I grab my phone from the nightstand and see that Ethan had texted me at five a.m. telling me they got the demon and that he was going to sleep for a few hours before coming home. Then, I waste twenty minutes scrolling through social media, mostly creeping on my brother to see what kind of dumb shit he’s been up to. Though, I notice he’s been oddly quiet, which probably has a lot to do with the fact that he dated a demon who then kidnapped him.
Giving up on going back to sleep, I get up, get dressed, make coffee, and do a little bit of straightening up before going outside and taking care of the horses and donkeys. It’s a bit warmer than yesterday and I should ride, but I’m still so jumpy from whatever happened last night that I’d make the horses nervous. Instead, I go inside and plug in the coffee pot. Not the best thing to consume when you’re all jittery, I know.