“I will. Of course I will. If she’s happier with women, I’m fine with that. I’m already getting used to the idea.”
“Want me to talk to her?”
Cait’s eyes rounded. “No. Why? No.”
“Breathe,” he suggested, caressing her collarbone. “It was just an idea.”
“No, thanks. Don’t want to overwhelm her.”
“Or you,” he said, smiling as he k
issed her neck. “Since you look like you swallowed a pickle whole.”
She nearly made a dirty joke and decided it wasn’t the right time. “I’ll wait till she comes to me on her own. If she does. I hope she knows she can. Tomorrow. I’ll make sure to talk to her tomorrow…” She trailed off at the brush of his fingers through the silky curls shielding her pussy. With one touch, she was warm and wet again. He nudged her legs open and swirled his thumb over her clit. “Um, what were we talking about?”
“Me making you come. Hard.” His voice took on a sensual edge. “I’m going to put my head between your thighs again. Except this time, I want you to do the same.”
She blinked. “I’m not that flexible.”
He laughed, the sound velvety smooth. “Your head between my legs, silly.”
“Oh.” Then as realization dawned, she said it once more. “Oh. Sixty-nine.”
“Mmm-hmm.”
From the way he was trying not to smile, she had to figure she looked as clueless as she felt. Not that she didn’t know what sixty-nine was. Nowadays every kid had probably heard that term by junior high. Heck, she’d even done it. But something about Tristan made her feel like a virgin in every sense of the word. There were so many things he’d experienced she couldn’t even imagine. He had a mirror over the bed, for pity’s sake. She was pretty sure he hadn’t put it up there just to complement the room’s design.
When he grinned, she grinned back. “I’m hopeless, aren’t I?”
“Far from it. You’re perfect.” He lifted her chin and kissed her, his lips molding to hers as if they belonged there.
The quick stutter in her heartbeat, she expected. The heat in her eyes when he slipped back, she didn’t. And this time, she wasn’t crying because she intended to let him go.
She couldn’t. Even five days’ separation had opened up a vast hollow of pain inside her, one only he and Matt could fill. As hard and scary as it was to think of going for it, of really planning a life with them, she couldn’t spend any more time living on opposite sides of this divide.
She’d tried to tell herself things would get better, that all they needed was time. Eventually they would be able to reclaim their previous friendship. But they couldn’t. She couldn’t look at Tristan and not want to be in his arms. She couldn’t laugh with Matt and not remember his dirty, sexy comments when they were in bed.
The three of them fit, and pretending otherwise only made liars out of them all.
If they went for the whole enchilada and people looked down on her, she’d deal. If her family freaked, she’d handle it. What she couldn’t deal with was losing the two people who mattered most to her in the world just because she was afraid.
“Tristan,” she whispered, forcing his name out over the lump in her throat.
“What?”
She fumbled for his hand and drew it up to her chest. “I’m really scared.”
His eyes darkened, and he clenched his jaw. “Caity—”
“No. No. You’re not getting it.” With effort, she managed to smile. “I want this. I want to be with you.”
He stared at her, not smiling, barely breathing. “And Matt?”
She nodded. “And Matt.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed several times as if he couldn’t stop swallowing. Then he enfolded her in a bear hug, squeezing her so tightly her lungs compressed from lack of oxygen. “Oh, baby, you won’t regret it. I promise. We’re going to make you so happy you won’t ever wonder if you made the right choice.” He kissed her hungrily. “God, I love you.”
She turned her face into his neck and let out a long breath. As nervous as she was, she was excited too. So excited about the future and what it might bring.