Since I lived in Baby Central, USA, you would assume I’d have a better handle on what to do with a child. You’d be wrong. I’d been single for a long time, barring a weekend last winter, and I didn’t spend a lot of time with my friends with babies. Gideon and Macy had just cranked one out, but they were nesting these days. I hadn’t made it over there for family dinner since right after Michael was born.
And he was a boy. I knew what to do with that variety.
At least I had the same damn parts.
This one was so female and pink. So small and wrinkly and whiny.
Not that I blamed her. She must’ve been so cold outside. Snow was threatening, as it did all the time here from approximately November until April. Sometimes until May in a particularly heinous year.
Here I’d taken away her blanket, such as it was. There was even a hole in the hem, and it wasn’t clean.
And none of that mattered right now.
I set her bottle on the floor, since that was of no interest to her at the moment. I could only hope the milk inside was fresh.
“Here you go,” I said in that same scratchy, gruff tone as I tucked the blanket around her.
She fussed even more, raising her arms, but I went with instinct and pinned them down against her sides. For a minute, I was fairly certain my so-called instinct was really my chili dog from lunch kicking back on me, because she certainly didn’t seem calmer. Then I grabbed her bottle and held it to her mouth, feeling like the biggest dolt ever. Lo and behold, her tiny pink mouth screwed up, and she finally stopped crying long enough to suck.
My brief elation that I obviously was a natural at this stuff faded when she turned her head away and spit up all over the blanket I hadn’t wanted to give her in the first place.
Quickly, I set aside the bottle and tugged up the blanket before taking it right over to the trash. I had to have something better than that to put her in. I glanced back at her before darting a look toward the stairs. If I could just run up to my room, I knew I must have something that could work in a pinch until I could give her to—
I shut my eyes as the squalling started anew, even more loudly. Who was I supposed to give her to? Her mother obviously couldn’t be trusted. She needed to be safe. And assuming I didn’t kill her through ineptitude, the place she would be safest was with me.
Yet I still ran upstairs to my room under the guise of looking for something to keep her warm. She had on a thin footie pajama set, for God’s sake. Not even a jacket in these frigid temperatures.
I searched the room for anything small but substantial enough to wrap her in. My quilt was gigantic and had been made by my Great-Aunt Erma. It was mostly white. With a baby, I knew that couldn’t be good. Besides, it was too huge for the boat. Maybe I could use one of my jackets.
Then my gaze landed on my flannel pillowcases. I got hot when I slept, so I didn’t go for the sheets, but I liked the plaid. One would work just fine as a baby sack.
I hoped.
I tugged one of the cases off and jogged downstairs to find the kid’s cries had trailed off into whimpers.
Swallowing hard, I rushed to crouch at her side. “Look what I have for you.” Carefully, I lifted her little legs and tried to stuff them into the pillowcase. She was so small that the thing would be big around her, but it had to offer some security, right?
I didn’t have any better ideas, so I was going with this one.
With some effort, I pulled the pillowcase up her body and tucked it under her arms when she didn’t seem to want to be tucked in again. She needed a pillow on the boat seat, so I grabbed the basket of clean folded laundry I’d left on the couch and pulled out a hoodie to fashion into a soft spot for her to rest her head.
She screwed up her tiny face as I slipped the hoodie under her, but she didn’t start screaming so I decided to roll with it.
I took one last glance into the baby basket, hoping somehow a stuffed animal had appeared when I wasn’t looking. Nope. So, we’d have to make do.
Testing my luck, I sprinted back up the stairs, well aware of the whines coming from the bedroom next to my master suite. Sadie would just have to wait a bit longer for liberation. I was actually surprised she hadn’t kicked up more of a fuss yet.
Maybe she knew all her daddy’s sins were coming home to roost.
I couldn’t really look at that semi-sweet baby down there as a sin. Sure, she’d mostly screamed at me, but she’d had a tough night.
My chest twisted. She might’ve had a tough life too so far, and that would probably give me some bad moments tonight when I tried to sleep.
I’d make up for what she’d been through. Somehow. With Gina’s help.
God, where the hell was Gina?
I