“Not just Laurie. For us. We both came from families that were a hot mess. I want Laurie to have an amazing mom as well as a sister. That’s because of you.”
I swallowed down the huge lump in my throat. I’d never believed I would be a mom. His little girl was more than I could ever hope for. And if I couldn’t have all of Seth, at least I’d have a part of him.
At least a child between us could be enough.
“I learned from the best.” I blinked away the rush of tears.
“You sure did. I wanted your mom to adopt me. One of the many reasons I want you in Laurie’s life. Can’t you see how perfect this is? How we are?”
“I’m so not my mother.”
“You’re even better.”
I tried to shift him off me. “Stop. I don’t need you to butter me up. I already said yes.”
“That’s not what this is.” He let me up, but didn’t move away. In fact, he reached for me, gripping my hair and dragging my gaze up to meet his. “I couldn’t imagine anyone else being the mother of my child. I wish you really were Laurie’s mother too, but I can’t wish away her mother because she’s part of Laurie. And Laurie is perfect just the way she is.”
“Yes, she is.”
“But the fact you love her so completely makes up for the rest.”
The rest. Aka his brief, shitty marriage. My chest tightened. It really was my fault Marj had left.
He’d just admitted as much.
Every part of me wanted to roll into a ball. I was the reason that little girl didn’t have a mother.
He lowered his mouth to mine. “Don’t cry, baby. I know you miss your mom.”
I clung tighter to him, letting him believe the grief living inside me was because of my mother. I missed her desperately, but I also knew she was at peace.
And she hadn’t been for a long, long time.
My tears mixed with his soft, sweet kisses. Because I didn’t have it in me to say no. And because I needed this as much as I needed oxygen, I melted into him.
Soft and gentle as rain. Maybe, just maybe…as healing.
I strained under him as we moved together faster. As the morning light streamed over our bed, with Seth braced over me, I wound my legs and arms around him as if I’d never let go.
When he came inside me, I held nothing back.
He nearly shouted out his release when I lifted my mouth to swallow it down inside me. I held that too. I held every piece of him close. I trailed my fingers up his back until his breathing evened.
I liked the stillness of the morning and my brain was too wired to drift off again no matter how tired I was. I sifted my fingers through his shaggy hair. The dark curls twined and teased my skin. Even in sleep he was hard to ignore.
A thud from out in the hallway made him jump. “Laurie?”
I kissed his temple and slid out from under him. “I’ll get her. Go back to sleep.”
“Are you sure?” His dark eyes were blurry and unfocused, but the father in him was ready to get up and take care of his little girl. It melted my heart even more.
“Yes. We’ll make some breakfast.”
He curled his arm under the pillow and slid the rest of the way off me with a low groan. “That sounds amazing. I’ll be down in just a few…” He didn’t even finish the sentence.
I laughed and pulled the sheet up over his distracting ass. I slipped out of his bed and darted for the bathroom. I’d fallen asleep wearing his T-shirt, but it was hopelessly wrinkled. I tossed it into the hamper and glanced at the huge glass shower. Those jets would probably feel amazing.
A second thump from down the hall and Laurie’s exaggerated shush put an end to that fantasy. I cleaned up as best I could before rummaging in Seth’s drawers for something to wear. I hadn’t packed an overnight bag, so a pair of boxers and T-shirt would have to do.