Something has been clawing at me. It has been two years, but now it’s digging in deep. I feel like it’s ripping at me. This need to just see her. To know I’m in the same room with her. To place my eyes on her. To see if those blue eyes of hers still shine like I remember them, or if I’d built them up in my mind to be more than they were.
The older man at the podium calls out the names in no particular order, so I can’t even try to gauge when she might be coming. What the hell happened to alphabetical? I grab the back of my neck, giving myself a squeeze and trying to pull some of the mounting tension out of my body. It’s been building since I got the invitation in the mail. You’d think I was on the job with how I’m feeling at this moment. A high risk job, where I’m just waiting for something big to happen at any moment.
“Eden Mathews,” the man finally says, making my head snap up just as she walks up the stairs to the stage. She looks like everything I remember. I curse myself for not getting a seat closer. I’d wanted to stand in the back. I’d only needed to get a glance, hoping it would be enough to kick whatever this pounding need I’ve been having to see her again, but now it’s going into overdrive. I kept telling myself it’s because a part of me feels protective of her. Proud, even, that she’s graduating. That what happened to her didn’t hold her back in life. That she’s moving forward.
But this need is turning into an obsession, taking on a life of its own. I want to get closer. The look clearly isn’t enough. As if she senses I’m here, her eyes come straight to me, even through the crowd of people. She focuses right in on me, her whole face lighting up in recognition, those dimples showing. I can see them from all the way back here. They make her look so fucking innocent it takes my breath away for a second.
I just stare at her, but she turns her head back to the person giving her her diploma. I feel the loss immediately. Worse than the time I had to finally let her go, placing her in the ambulance and watching it drive away.
Something is different. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. I turn and make my way out the exit. I’m not sure what the fuck I’m doing or where I’m going. I just know I can’t breathe.
Chapter Three
Eden
He came. Those words repeat over and over again in my head. I knew I could feel him when I walked on the stage as if my body was just attuned to him. I turned to look and he was just there staring back at me with the most intense eyes. Eyes I could never forget. Eyes I haven't forgotten over the years. This crush never lessened, even with time.
When I exited the stage I didn’t go back to my seat like I was supposed to. I rushed to where he was standing but he was gone. Nowhere to be found. I didn’t even get to talk to him. Not even a simple hello. There were so many things I wanted to say but he just left. Like the last time I’d seen him. Just gone without a trace. Taking a little part of me with him.
I look at myself in the mirror of my bedroom having removed my gown and dress and now only wearing a swimsuit for the party my parents had put together.
Maybe he’s come tonight. I invited him to both the graduation and the party. But what if he doesn’t, a little voice in the back of my head whispers making a knot form in my tummy.
He has to. He will.
I make myself believe those words. There’s no other option, he has to come. I’ve been waiting for this moment for the past two years. To talk to the man that saved my life. I’d researched the story a few times since that day.
There had been plenty of articles on the kidnapping. My stepfather is a rich man and the news ate up the story. Wanting to know anything and everything. I soaked up all their stories equally. Some might think I was annoyed with the press but I wasn't. It gave me away to find out more about Coen. Like that he killed the man that had taken me and lost everything because of it.
I’d never been so scared in my life than I had been that day but I’ll never forget looking out the window and seeing Coen standing there. His arms open for me.
It was the first time I’d ever felt like someone was really there for me. I’d had no doubt he’d catch me when I’d flung myself into his arms and wrapped around him. Never wanting to let go of the security I felt beginning there.
It was a feeling I wanted back. I’d been missing it all those years, never having found that security again.
Chapter Four
Coen
I hold the small pink box in my hand and feel silly. It’s tied with a sparkly pink ribbon and looks more like a present for a little girl than someone graduating high school. She doesn’t look like a little girl anymore. My heart thumps as I walk toward the front door.
Pushing the thought aside, I knock on the door and try not to fidget while I wait. After half a second it flies open, revealing a short older woman. She’s much too old to be Eden’s mother, and I think for a moment that I might have the wrong house.
“Welcome, Mr. Black. The Boltons are expecting you. Everyone is out by the pool.”
She steps out of the way and points me towards the back of the house. When I step on the back deck, I’m greeted by Eden’s stepfather, John. We shake hands, and then his wife, Melanie, walks over to greet me as well.
“We are so glad you were able to make it today. Eden didn’t tell us until last night that you might be coming. So good of you to come by and say hello,” Melanie says, looking around the pool. “She’s around here somewhere.”
I see a lot of young kids in the pool playing what looks like volleyball over a net, and a large group off to the side, around the catered tables and wait staff. At the other end of the pool is a group of adults, everyone in swimwear. I’m fully clothed in the ridiculous June heat, and I almost feel awkward about it. I can already feel drops of sweat falling down my back, and the pool looks heavenly.