My mom must sense my presence because she turns, smiles, and waves before returning to her practice. Following my nose, I head into the kitchen to scarf down some home-cooked food. The food at Serenity Springs was okay, but it wasn’t anything to write home about.
No sooner do I sit down to eat when the doorbell rings. I wait to see if anyone from the staff will answer it, but when the sound chimes again, I reluctantly get up and make my way to the door.
I don’t mind seeing Carson and Brayden, but I’m mentally unprepared to talk with Rebel right now. Maybe she’s a trigger for all of this mess, a major reason I started snorting coke. I doubt it, but if I can lay blame, it’s going to be on her.
I open the door and extend my arm. “Welcome to chez McKnight.”
“You look better,” Rebel says as she strides past me and into the foyer. I’m getting a really weird vibe from her, something I can’t explain. I glance quickly at Bray and Carson, who are looking anywhere but at me. Fucking great—she’s here to kick me out of Virtuous Paradox for my colossal fuckup.
“Make yourselves at home.” I motion for everyone to sit down, and once they do, I grab the nearest chair and sit.
“So, you’re probably wondering why we’re here,” Rebel says.
You can say that again.
“I gave you all some time off after I realized that in my haste to get Virtuous Paradox out front I may have pushed a little too hard. Has it paid off? Yes, it has. The deals for merchandise, the tour invitations, and the requests to have you on shows have surpassed our expectations. I made stars out of the three of you.
“And now we have a lot of work to do. The label wants new music out yesterday, with a new album right after that. You’ll have appearances to make, events to attend. And, most importantly, you need to be back on top of the charts.”
As Rebel goes on, I feel my stress level rising. Maybe I’m not cut out for this industry. I’m not even twenty-four hours out of rehab and already I’m stressed out.
“You’re going to do all of this, plus try to live a normal life,” she says. Inwardly I scoff—there’s no way we can get all of that done and sleep six to eight hours a night. “The label doesn’t want any more incidents.” She looks directly at me, making sure that I know she’s referring to rehab.
“Our first order of business is to get the tracks laid down for the new song. Bodhi, I sent you the music. Did you learn it?”
I nod.
“Great. That’s the song you’ll perform at the awards show. You were each given a plus-one for that, by the way. I prefer that you don’t use it—it’s better that the women think you’re single. But if you do, make sure they’re models or something. The more photos of you out there, the better.” Rebel says a few more things before getting up and leaving the three of us in the living room. Once she’s out of sight, I breathe a sigh of relief.
My mom walks in all cheerful while the three of us look glum. If she notices, she doesn’t say anything as she makes her way to her bedroom. She probably doesn’t want to screw up her yoga high or anything with my melodramatic bullshit.
“My mom loves Maggie,” I say, breaking the ice. “Dad told me that you brought her over and my mom is smitten. I have no doubt that she’s going to be pressuring me for kids once she finds out I have a girlfriend.”
Their mouths drop open and I immediately realize my blunder. I should’ve worded things differently, but now that the cat’s out of the bag, I shrug it off.
“Details,” Carson says.
Scrubbing my hands over my face, I sigh. “I met her at rehab, which by the way, if you have questions or whatever, ask me. I’m not going to lie to you guys. I started doing coke with Aspen and couldn’t stop, but I’m clean now and want to stay clean. I like this side of me better than the asshole I was. I had tried coke before and didn’t think anything of it, so when I did it again, I couldn’t stop. Then our schedule with the group started and I was exhausted, except when I was high, I could do anything, so I kept up the habit. I needed it to deal with everything and to stay awake.”
“I’m sorry, man,” Carson says. “What can I do to help?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Exhaustion, stress, and my desire to be the best are what led me to start. I have to watch those things. I know Rebel wants us to party and shit, but I can’t, not yet.”
“When Maggie’s around, I won’t even drink beer,” Brayden says.
I can’t help but laugh. We’re young and should be having fun, but instead we seem to have turned into a bunch of fuddy-duddies.
“Back to the woman. We want details!” Carson says.
A smile creeps onto my face. “Her name is Kimberly, and from the moment I saw her, I thought she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever met. She’s sweet, caring, and rocks my fucking world.”
“Damn, Bodhi, getting it done in rehab!” Brayden says admiringly.
I laugh but tell him, “Nah, it wasn’t like that, Bray. We have a connection. I’ve never met anyone else that I wanted to spend all my time with.”
“I’m happy for you, man,” Carson says, “but I have to ask—is it smart to get involved with someone from rehab? I mean isn’t she battling the same demons you are?”
“What? Oh, shit no. She works there. She’s like this one-on-one counselor.”