Aiden and I doing... all the things we’d done.
Drew. Beaten bloody and fighting for his life.
It weighed on me, each event another heavy cement block to carry, making walking into my house facing my possibly irate mother and having to tell her about Drew, paralyzed me completely.
I couldn’t imagine having to say the words out loud.
“I don’t want to go home,” I whispered once he’d gotten in and closed his door. “Not yet.”
I knew my mom would be home, probably sitting in the dark, seething.
With only a nod, Aiden reversed out of the parking lot and headed back toward his place. He didn’t ask for an explanation.
I sent my mom a quick message telling her I was staying at Camille’s tonight since Ethan was at a sleepover also. I didn’t wait for a reply before I put my phone away.
The night seemed ominous as we drove through the darkness. Earlier I’d felt safe and sexy, making out with the hottest guy I’d ever met. Now I felt strange. Unsettled. Cold and hollow down to my bones.
I was still somewhere dark and lonely in my mind when we pulled up at his house. Aiden turned off the Jeep and glanced at me. “Hang tight,” he said before getting out and coming around to my door.
I let him help me down, then trudged inside behind him, wrapping my arms around my mid-section.
Once we were inside the Airstream, Aiden cleared his throat loudly. “You want something to drink?”
“Um, sure.” My voice sounded foreign in my ears. I followed him toward the kitchen, hoping the sugar would help me feel normal again.
I stood aside as he opened the refrigerator door.
“OJ, milk, water, whiskey, or beer?”
“Juice sounds good.” My mouth was dry and tasteless.
I watched as he retrieved two glasses from a nearby cabinet and poured OJ out of a carton for us both.
After we finished our drinks, Aiden jerked his chin toward the door behind him. “The. shower is small but functional. You can borrow something else to sleep in.”
I glanced at my blood-soaked clothes. God, no wonder Drew’s mom wanted me gone. I was a constant reminder of the pain her son had suffered.
“I got blood on your clothes,” I said quietly.
“It’s okay.” He stepped into the other room for a moment then came back with a hockey jersey and more sweatpants. “Sorry I don’t have more clothes out here. Most of them are in the house.”
“It’s okay. Thanks.”
Aiden leaned against the counter. “Towels are in the closet. There’s a sliding door.”
Despite the sugar from the juice, I was still in a fog. The remnants of shock still holding me underwater. I was too exhausted to ask questions, so I mumbled “thanks” again and headed to the bathroom.
Once I was alone and away from his scrutiny, I felt myself begin to crumble. Piece by piece, whatever had held me together all this time began to break apart.
I swallowed hard, a futile attempt to keep my emotions at bay. In my entire life, I’d never seen anything like Drew’s battered body lying lifeless in the street.
Bile rose in my throat and I choked, forcing tears to leak from my eyes. Worried Aiden would hear my breakdown, I jerked the knob in the shower upward until the spray drowned out my sobs. I shed the bloody clothes, leaving them in a pile on the floor and stepped into the glass and tile shower, closing the door behind me.
Fighting the urge to slink down into the floor, I washed my hair. My shoulders wracked violently as I tried to scrub my body hard enough to make the soap lather. While rinsing off, the spray hit my skull and created a mesmerizing steady sound in my ears. I remained still, embracing the numbness it provided for as long as I could.
The water had turned cooler when I heard the knock. I jumped, snapping back to reality and wondering how long I’d been standing in the shower.
“Emersyn? You okay?”