He nodded. And gulped. “So you’ve told me.”
“How long are you going to make me wait, Jeff? You say you’ve forgiven me, that you hold no resentment. You’re forging a relationship with your daughter and your niece and nephew. They’re growing to love you.” She came closer, stroked his forearm.
Wild stallions trampled inside him. His cock roared to life.
“Why not me, Jeff? Why can’t we have what we once did?”
So many reasons—reasons he could never divulge to her. Reasons that wouldn’t make sense to her. They made sense only to him.
“I know you still love me, Jeff. I can see it in your eyes every time you look at me.”
He said nothing. What could he say? Of course he still loved her. He’d never stopped.
“And you know I love you. My whole life, I’ve loved only one man. You.”
Ripples of fire blazed up his arm as she continued to stroke him. His cock hardened to granite inside his boxers. Thank God for the covers.
“We could have that life now. The one we used to talk about. Do you remember?”
Remember? Those memories played like an epic movie in his mind. Over and over again. God, yes, he remembered.
But he didn’t nod. He still said nothing.
“You haven’t denied that you love me.”
Of course he hadn’t. He couldn’t.
“Could you say it, Jeff? Please? Just say you love me. I need to hear it.”
His lips trembled. The words formed on his vocal cords but stayed lodged in his throat. If he said it, if he let those three little words out, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. He’d grab her and kiss her—God, the memory of her kisses still brought him to his knees. Then he’d make love to her. He wouldn’t be able to stop himself.
So he had to stop now.
He stayed silent.
One solitary tear dripped down Mia’s smooth cheek, glistening in the moonlight streaming in from the window.
She turned and left.
How he’d wanted to take her in his arms.
But he couldn’t. He just couldn’t.
He wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to.
She’d apologized profusely the next day for her wanton behavior. Yes, she’d actually used the word wanton, his Mia. The few times she’d brought up their relationship since then, he’d lied to her that he still couldn’t forgive her betrayal, as he had this morning.
Truth be told, he’d forgiven her as soon as he’d moved onto the ranch. He’d forgiven Wayne too. Problem was, one person still existed whom he couldn’t forgive.
Himself.
* * *
He still loved her. Maria knew it with all her heart. But something was keeping him from her. He’d gotten close to Angie, to Harper and Catie, even to some of the other folks around town.
Yet he still couldn’t forgive her.
Well, could she blame him? She hadn’t wanted to seduce Wayne and pass off Angie as his child, but she’d been eighteen and penniless, from a modest—okay, crappy—part of town. She’d felt she had no choice. Between a rock and a hard place. What else could she have done? Angie had deserved better. Truly, she had done it for Angie and not herself. That was the God’s honest truth, no matter what Jeff insisted on thinking.