“Do you…understand what will happen?” He panted in her ear. “Do you?”
“Of course. And what I didn’t know my sister told me. I just didn’t expect you to be quite so…engorged.”
Cameron laughed softly. “Perhaps I’m better endowed than the duke.”
“What?”
“Never mind, my darling. Are you sure you want to do this?”
“Yes, yes, please. I want it more than anything.” Rose sat up and tugged at Cameron’s black formal coat. “I want to touch you.”
* * * *
Rose’s face was flushed in the moonlight, her eyes shimmering with passion and promise as she looked at him, her shoulders creamy white as a new-fallen snow, and her bare breasts hanging gently, their tips rosy and puckered. God, she was lovely, and Cameron wanted her, hungered for her. She was his for the taking. He could have her once and remember this night forever.
“Damn it,” he said gruffly.
He couldn’t do it. She was a virgin, a lady of the peerage, the daughter of an earl, for God’s sake. Cameron removed her hands from his coat. “Rose, we’re going to stop now.”
“No, no.” She pulled at his hands, trying to release her arms. “I want to, Cameron.”
“Sweetheart, I need to leave you while I still have a shred of sanity left.” He pulled her to her feet. “You’ll regret it if I take you this way, outside, in the grass. You deserve to be loved in the comfort of a bed. Your first time shouldn’t be like this.”
“No,” Rose said. “If…If this is all we’ll ever have, I want it now. Please.”
“You deserve more. You deserve better. Better than…”
“What?” she asked, toying with his cravat. “Better than what, Cameron?”
He looked down at the grass, at his feed shod in shiny leather boots. His formal wear had cost more than he normally paid for clothing in a year, yet he had used a portion of the money he had earned from the duke’s waltz, money that could have helped his family. The duke had requested his presence at the wedding ball as composer of the piece, and Cameron had bought the garments so he wouldn’t look like a mere peasant. He had bought them for Rose. To impress her. He knew he was attractive to women. He knew he looked elegant in his black courtly clothes. He knew she would notice him, and she had. But he was still a tenant on the duke’s land. The expensive suit didn’t change that. He was nothing.
“Better than me, Rose,” he said quietly.
Rose reached up and touched his cheek. “You’re the one I want. The one I’ve always wanted. Perhaps we can’t be together for the long term, but—”
“Then what is the point of this?” he asked gently. “I’ll ruin you.”
“I don’t care.” She reached for his arousal through his trousers. “You still want me.”
“God, yes.”
“Then take me, Cameron. I’m yours tonight.”
God forgive him his weakness. He pulled her to him and kissed her passionately, easing her down to the grass once again. He reached under her skirts and stroked her. She was still wet for him. He hastily unbuttoned his trousers, freeing his aching erection, and moved on top of her.
“It may hurt a bit,” he said. “I’ll try to be gentle.”
“Yes, I know. It will be all right.”
He nudged the head of his cock through the slit in her drawers, rubbing it against her juices. “Oh God,” he groaned. “Oh God, Rose.” He teased her entrance, braced himself to begin his descent.
“No!” Rose pushed against his shoulder, her eyes suddenly icy and full of terror. “No! I changed my mind. I can’t, I can’t!”
He moved away from her quickly, the unsated hunger almost unbearable. “Damn you,” he said between clenched teeth. “I gave you two chances to stop me, you little cocktease. Damn you!”
Rose began to weep quietly, hurriedly tucking her breasts back into her bodice. She stood. “Please forgive me,” she said, her gaze cast downward. She ran away, sobbing.
“Damn it,” Cameron said under his breath, and then, loudly, his voice strained with remorse, “I’m sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean it! Come back, sweetheart. Please!” He would hold her and comfort her, tell her it was all right, that he would wait for her.