“What the fuck, Don?”
I walk in without an invitation. “Let’s chat.”
“In the middle of the damned night?”
“Yeah, in the middle of the damned night.” I make my way to his office and walk in, taking a seat.
“You’ve got some nerve.”
“Dale, I’ve got a Mack truck rolling over my brain inside my head, I just arranged for someone from the energy board to illegally close down a bar, and Callie and I had a humdinger of a fight, not to mention what Uncle Joe just laid on me, so don’t even start with me.”
“Uncle Joe?”
“Yeah. Apparently, he, Ryan, and Bryce think Joe was the target of our mystery assassin, and I have to admit, it makes sense. Dad was in the north quadrant, which is Joe’s domain.”
“Fuck.” Dale runs his fingers through his already messed-up hair.
“Now get in here, sit your ass down, and spill whatever’s left that you haven’t told me.”
“It’s nothing, Don.”
I grit my teeth. “I’m in no mood for lies, Dale. No fucking mood.”
His facial features soften, then—a mixture of love and determination.
I’ve seen the look before.
All those years ago, when he safeguarded me. When he was taking what was meant for me. All those years, he protected me, and at what cost? Himself. He took the beatings, the rapes, the torture so I wouldn’t have to.
He’s protecting me still, and it needs to stop. Without all the information, I can’t do what has to be done.
“Please.” I soften my tone. “I need this. I won’t be able to sleep until I know all that you know.”
“I’ve told you all I know,” he says. “Dad didn’t elaborate.”
“Then what are you hiding? Because I know you, Dale. I know you.”
He clears his throat. “I’ve thought about whether to tell you my last secret. It’s not something you need to know, but it’s something I feel you should know. Even if you end up hating me.”
I widen my eyes. “Hate you? I could never.”
“You haven’t heard what I’m about to say yet.”
“Fine.” I’m too tired to argue. “Shoot.”
He inhales. “It’s not that easy.”
“You can tell me anything. We’ve seen each other at our worst, Dale. At our very worst. We don’t need to have secrets.”
“This is a big one, Don.”
“It’s not too big to share with me. I promise.”
“God, if you only knew…”
Dale’s forehead wrinkles, and he rubs at his stubbled jawline. He’s troubled. Both happy and content—due to Ashley and his newfound love, no doubt—and troubled. It’s an odd look.
We’re a hugging family, but Dale and I aren’t touchy-feely brothers. Despite this, I reach forward and grasp his forearm. It’s cold as ice.
He yanks it away. “No. Not until I get this off my chest.”
“Okay.”
“I know you’re trying to comfort me. Tell me it’s all okay, and I believe it will be. In time, anyway.”
I go rigid. Something’s up. Something big. “Dale, whatever it is, it will be okay.”
“I’m not sure you’ll be able to forgive me.”
“Forgive you? For what? You’ve taken care of me your whole life. Even when I’ve gotten sick of it.”
“I can’t take this to the grave. I’ve tried. I held it inside me for so long that it got buried. But then… Ashley…”
“What about Ashley?”
“She opened up something in me. Let it all loose. It’s been wonderful, but parts of it were also terrible. Horrific, even.”
“Dale”—I force a chuckle, trying to ease the situation—“you’re not making marriage sound all that great.”
He shakes his head vehemently. “That’s not what I mean at all. My feelings for Ashley kind of exploded inside me. Brought out the bad with the good, if that makes sense.”
“Sure, it makes sense.” Sort of.
“I’ve debated whether to tell you this thing—this thing I buried inside myself for so long. Aunt Mel and Ashley say it’s my decision. Dad says—”
“Wait a minute,” I interrupt him. “Whatever this thing is that concerns me, three other people know about it?”
He swallows. “Yeah. They do. But I only told them recently.”
I’m not sure whether to be angry. My brother is so strong. Way stronger than I am. But whatever this is, it’s bringing him to his knees.
So I won’t give him shit about telling others before me. Aunt Mel is probably acting as his therapist, Ashley’s his wife, and Dad… Well, he and Dad are close the way Mom and I are close.
I get it.
I could make it easy for him. I could tell him that whatever it is, I forgive him. I no doubt will. I can’t imagine anything Dale could do that I wouldn’t forgive. But I can’t. I have to know everything. Going into what we’re about to with any blind spots could be very detrimental.
“This isn’t easy, Don.”
“Few things in life are easy,” I say. “But if this is eating you up inside, just tell me. We’ll work it out.”
He nods then.