No.
Not ready to go there.
I touched his cheek, rubbed my fingers against his stubble.
“Can you see it?” he asked. “Can you see the truth in my eyes?”
“Yes,” I said, and then I swallowed all my apprehension. “What do you see in mine?”
He smiled. “I see a lot of things that you’re probably not ready to face yet, and that’s okay. We have all the time in the world.”
And it hit me like a wheelbarrow full of river rock.
Love.
That’s what he was seeing.
That’s what I wasn’t ready to face.
I was in love with Ryan Steel.
I, who had no idea what love even was…so how could I know?
But I did.
* * *
“See you later,” I said to my father, who was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee. I’d left him a plate of dinner that was currently heating in the microwave.
“Where are you off to?” The harsh fluorescent lighting in the kitchen illuminated his features—was he angry, or simply mistrustful?—in an eerie way.
“Just meeting a friend for a milkshake. I’ll be home before dark.”
I’d had dinner alone. My father was rarely home for dinner, and I had learned to fend for myself while living with my mother. She had worked three jobs to keep us afloat, and I’d been doing my own cooking since I was eight years old. Real cooking, because the processed meals were more expensive than buying actual meat and vegetables. I’d been shopping and cooking for what seemed like most of my life.
Since I was only fifteen, it had been most of my life.
I walked toward the door, but his footsteps followed and he overtook me. He stood against the door. “You’re not going anywhere tonight.”
I’d only lived with my father for a couple of months. So far, he’d given me an allowance. More money than I’d ever seen. He’d been good to me. He’d helped me get acclimated to my new home, the community, and had helped me make friends in the neighborhood. I was planning to meet one of those friends tonight for a shake.
“Dad.” The word fell from my lips in slow motion. It still didn’t feel right. The man was still a virtual stranger to me. But he’d been trying. At least up until now. “Dana’s expecting me. I won’t be late.” I reached for the doorknob.
“Not tonight, Ruby.” He brushed my hand from the knob.
I looked up at him. His eyes were so dark, almost black. He was a handsome man, olive complexion and dark hair, but something sinister lurked in his gaze tonight.
Something I hadn’t seen before.
Maybe I hadn’t been looking.
A knife of fear lanced into me.
I was in danger.
I turned to run back into the kitchen and toward the back door, but he grabbed me by the arm and yanked me against his chest. Hard.
“What do you want?” I asked breathlessly. “Why can’t I go meet Dana?”