Without my permission, my soapy hand slid down my body and wrapped around my cock, which was already beginning to swell from the images in my head.
I couldn’t do this. The asshole would come back. I’d have to face him. I couldn’t do that if I let this continue, but I also couldn’t stop. This fantasy was embarrassing as fuck, but it was harmless when I was here by myself. No one ever had to know. That was the easiest way to live out my fantasies—alone with no one to judge me. Trying to tell a man what I wanted was just too much for me, and no one would ever guess.
I imagined the dangerous man pinning me to the wall in the archive room as I worked my cock slowly. He’d yank my arms over my head and hold them there. One of his large hands would be all he needed to hold both my wrists. I wasn’t delicate, but I had no doubt he could subdue me easily.
That would leave his other hand free to touch me, to take whatever he wanted. I would be helpless. Even if I changed my mind, even if I no longer wanted to pay him in that way, I was trapped now. I was his.
But even if I didn’t want this, I knew I would enjoy it. I’d enjoy anything the man did to me. He might be dangerous. He might be arrogant and so goddamn frustrating. He might think that no rules applied to him, but I didn’t think he’d hurt me. He’d make it good for me. That would matter to him.
I imagined him taking my cock in hand, stroking me firmly, quickly, giving me no time to catch my breath. In my fantasy, he didn’t worry about niceties. He didn’t ask questions, but somehow he knew exactly what I needed.
Hot water pelted my shoulders as I imagined him jerking me off while keeping me pinned to the wall. The image was so potent my knees threatened to buckle. I had to lean back and let the tile take my weight.
“Don’t move,” the man ordered.
I kept my arms over my head even after he let me go. His fingers traced their way along the side of my neck, over my chest, pausing to toy with my nipples before sliding down over my abdomen.
I closed my eyes and imagined that the drops of water pouring over my body were his hands as he caressed all of me, making me feel seen.
Most of the men I’ve been with liked to hurry everything. Getting off was all they cared about. I didn’t matter to them, but in my mind, the arrogant stranger wasn’t like that. He took his time, slowing his hand on my cock, teasing me until I burned for him, until I was so hard it hurt and precum slicked my cock like lube.
My fantasy didn’t need any basis in reality, so I imagined the man dropping to his knees in front of me, smiling up at me, and telling me how he longed to taste me.
I gasped as I imagined his hot mouth enveloping me and swallowing me all the way down. I moved my hand faster and faster as I let the fantasy play out in my head.
He sucked me hard, holding my gaze the entire time, smiling around my cock as it stretched his lips. He loved sucking me. He didn’t mind being on his knees in front of me. He wanted this. He wanted me.
I cried out as I came, and I was glad I lived alone. The sound seemed to echo through the apartment.
My orgasm went on and on until, exhausted, I slid down the wall and sat on the floor, letting water beat down on me. A few minutes passed before I could contemplate standing and continuing to wash myself off, and it took until I turned the shower off and dried myself for me to regret what I’d done.
Now that I’d let that fantasy roll and seen how potent it could be, I knew this wouldn’t be the only time I would see the arrogant man in my mind. I was afraid he’d be part of every orgasm I gave myself for a long time. That was not okay.
5
Lancelot
Earlier that day, I’d accidentally seen Corbin fucking his boyfriend on the kitchen counter of a house they were supposed to be touring. It was convenient for me to have a real estate license for some of our business ventures, so I’d been stuck acting as their agent. At least I wouldn’t have to go through that again since they’d decided to buy that house. Maybe the sturdy counter had swayed them.
I wasn’t thrilled about having to see him again on the same day. I’d rather allow some time for that memory to get out of my head, but I knew it was important to him to be a full part of the family business, and that meant he’d be there to hear about whatever shit Remington had gotten us involved in.