Even though I’ve just orgasmed, a fresh wave of need crashes over me. Unconsciously, my thighs fall open. His gaze drops to my core, and, if it’s possible, his dick swells.
Becoming harder.
Thicker.
Desire surges within me until it’s all I can focus on.
He hunkers down, snatching the denim before slipping something from the pocket. Once he straightens, I notice the slim foil packet clenched in his fingers. Only now do I realize that we never discussed protection.
My tongue darts out to moisten parched lips. “We don’t have to use that. I’m on the pill.”
His brow furrows. “Are you sure?” There’s a pause before he tacks on, “I haven’t had sex in six months. I’m clean. But I don’t want to do anything that puts you at risk. If you want me to wear a condom, I have no problem doing it.”
If this were any other guy, I wouldn’t have even mentioned being on the pill. But this is Carson. Not only do I trust him to tell me the truth, but to protect me as well.
“It’s okay.”
He sucks his bottom lip into his mouth and chews it as if silently debating the right course of action.
When a few tortuous seconds tick by, I spread my legs wider, wanting to put an end to this conversation. “No condom.”
His pupils dilate, the black overtaking the golden brown color, as his attention stays fixated on me. The square package falls to the floor as he returns to the bed and crawls up my body. When he reaches the vee between my legs, he presses his mouth to mine before stretching out until the blunt tip of his cock can nudge the lips of my pussy.
His gaze latches onto mine as he pauses, keeping himself immobile. “Still good?”
I nod as my arms slip over his shoulders to twine around his neck and pull him closer. I draw in a steady breath as he carefully maneuvers himself inside me. The muscles around him stretch to accommodate his girth. Even though I’m slick with need, there’s still a bite of pain that leaves me wincing.
His teeth clench as the muscle in his jaw tics. “Fuck, baby. I’ve never had sex without a condom before. I can’t believe how damn good it feels. Your pussy is so tight. It’s like you have me in a vise.” Beads of sweat pop out across his brow as he continues to gently inch his way inside. “This feels too good. There’s no way I’ll last long,” he groans.
My brows pinch together at the fullness now radiating from my center as he continues to push forward. He can’t be more than halfway inside me, and already it feels as if there’s nowhere else for him to go.
“Are you all right?” Tension vibrates throughout his voice, making it sound tightly strung.
I press my lips together and nod.
“Do you want me to stop? All you have to do is say the word and we won’t go any further.”
It’s tempting.
All those good vibes buzzing beneath my skin, electrifying every nerve ending, have vanished. Even though there’s a smattering of pain and discomfort, I can’t imagine putting a stop to what’s unfolding between us. More than anything, I want to experience this with Carson. I knew my first time would be painful, but I also realize it’ll get better.
“No. I want to keep going.”
A tortured expression settles across his face as he takes shallow thrusts before butting up against a barrier. “This is going to hurt, and the last thing I want to do is cause you pain.”
The gentleness of his voice soothes everything abraded within me, making it easier to continue. No one else would ever take the time or care that Carson has with me. And that’s what makes all the difference in the world.
“It’s okay. I’ll be all right.”
“Give me your mouth so I can swallow down all of your cries.”
I tilt my chin, offering up my lips. As soon as his settle over mine, I open until his tongue can slip inside and mingle with my own. As I sink into the kiss, his hips fall into a steady rhythm. The shallow movements steadily become faster and more forceful. They batter the thin membrane until finally, one hard drive breaks through it and he’s buried to the hilt inside my body. Pain rips through me as a choked sob escapes. Just like he claimed, he drinks down all of my cries. Hot tears leak from the corners of my eyes as his movements cease, allowing me time to adjust to the foreign intrusion.
It’s only when I quiet that he pulls away enough to search my face. “I’m sorry, Elle. I wish it didn’t have to be that way.”
I can’t help but feel like a baby for making such a big deal out of something that’s more of a rite of passage than anything else. Every woman who engages in this activity goes through a similar experience. “It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt quite so much now.”