Come to think about it, he didn’t seem all that bent out of shape when we’d found Theo in the kitchen. The idea that she might have confided in my brother but withheld information from me cuts deep.
Her expression falters, her smile dimming as she reaches across the table and lays her hand over mine before giving it a squeeze. “Of course not. I would never tell one of you something and not the other. Especially something as important as this.”
I nod, slightly mollified by her response. But still...four months. That seems like a long time to keep a lid on their relationship. My brain tumbles back in time, counting out the months.
“So that means you began dating in July?”
This time when she nods, it’s more cautiously. “Yes, that’s right.”
“Why didn’t you say something then?”
Her shoulders slump under the heavy weight of my question before she releases a steady breath. “When Theo first asked me out in June, I turned him down. Even though it’s been years since your father passed away, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to date or get involved with another man. He seemed to understand that and said he was happy to be friends. We grabbed coffee a few times and it was nice. Easy. He made me laugh, and I hadn’t done that in a long time.”
The way her dark eyes turn wistful has a lump of wet sawdust settling in the middle of my throat.
“After that, we began spending more time together, discovering all the things we had in common and,” she shrugs, “I guess it grew from there. I didn’t want to mention anything to either you or your brother until I knew it was serious.”
It’s frightening to realize that Mom is already in a committed relationship with this guy. I understand her not wanting to introduce random men to her children, but the flip side is that we now need to get used to someone who she’s already developed strong feelings for. And vice versa.
“I want both of you to get better acquainted with Theo. It’s important to me that you like him. I can’t imagine bringing someone into our family who you or Brayden didn’t get along with.”
I release a steady breath as she runs out of steam. There are so many conflicting emotions churning inside me that it’s difficult to pinpoint exactly what I’m thinking or feeling.
Am I happy for Mom?
Sure. Of course.
Does that necessarily mean I want someone taking Dad’s place in her life or ours?
Not really.
When I remain silent, her fingers wrap more tightly around my hand. “I think I’m ready to move on, and I need you to be all right with me taking that next step. It’s been the three of us for so long. I’m hoping there’s enough room for Theo in all of our lives. Do you think that’s possible?”
Even though I’m conflicted about the situation, I’m loath to tell her that I’m not interested in getting to know her new boyfriend.
The word has a pit forming at the bottom of my gut.
Mom has a boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
This was something I’d worried about immediately after Dad died. But when the months turned into years and she failed to express any real interest in dating or men, it seemed like we’d dodged a major bullet. And, rather selfishly, I enjoyed it just being the three of us and having Mom all to myself.
Now that she’s ready to move on, I’m not sure if I am. It seems like a lot to wrap my head around.
It doesn’t escape me that Mom is still young, beautiful, and full of energy. She deserves to have a partner who makes her happy to share the rest of her life with. She’s always been supportive of everything I’ve wanted to do. Even acting. She understands that the end goal after college is to move to New York and make it on Broadway.
There have been a handful of students in my acting classes whose parents refuse to pay for their education unless they majored in something more realistic that will lead to a good job that pays well and offers benefits. The reality of the situation is that most people who end up with a theater degree will do something totally different with their lives. Even though the odds are stacked against me, I can’t imagine pursuing another career. Maybe at some point in the future, I’ll change my mind and redirect my energies. But for the time being, I’m pouring everything I have into turning my dreams into a reality.
Which is exactly what prompts me to say, “Yeah, Mom. I’d like the chance to get to know him better. If he’s free, you can bring him to the play.”
A sheen of tears brightens her eyes as she beams at me. “Thank you, I think he’d enjoy that very much.”