“You look beautiful,” I tell her, taking her hand in mine and pulling her into my arms since the kids are nowhere in sight. “I should’ve told you that when you first got here. I’m sorry.”
“Eh.” She waves me off playfully. “All in the life of a parent.” She shrugs. “You clean up well.” She runs her palm along my freshly shaven face. “But I have to admit, I like the scruff.”
“I’ll never shave again,” I joke, making Joanie laugh.
“I’m going to check on the kids,” she says. “Have fun.”
We take the elevator down, and I grab my car from the valet since I’ve made reservations at a restaurant on the other side of the island. We’re both quiet for several minutes before I decide to break the silence. My time with Sawyer is limited, and I need to make the most of it.
“Would you rather have a life rewind button or a life pause button?” She glances over at me and raises a single brow. “My parents used to play this game during long car rides.”
“Are you close with your parents?” she asks.
“Yeah, for the most part. My dad played in the NFL too. Retired many years ago, and they live in Florida most of the year. But they have a place in New York as well to visit the kids and me. I’m an only child, so my kids are pretty spoiled.”
“Wow, two football players in the family? That’s crazy.”
“It’s actually common. When your dad is good, they’re more likely to follow your game as well. What about you? Are you close with your parents?”
“Too close,” she mutters, but the quirk of her lips tells me she isn’t as unhappy about that as she’s making it seem. “I live with them. When Joey left me high and dry, they offered to let me move in rent-free as long as I promised to go to college. It was an offer I couldn’t refuse. They’ve been my rock, especially since my brother and sister flew the coop years ago and haven’t returned.”
“Moral support is important. I don’t know what I would’ve done without my parents when Clara died. Presley was born right in the middle of the season. We were undefeated. I thought Clara would give birth, and then I’d go back to work…”
“Did you go back?”
I swallow the lump of emotion down. I started it, so it’s only fair I finish, but it’s hard to go back to those days. “Yeah, I did. And I got a lot of shit for it. I could’ve pulled out, terminated my contract. My wife had just died. But I couldn’t do it. I took two weeks off, and then another since it was a bye week. And then I returned. We won the Super Bowl that year.”
But my wife was still dead, and my newborn daughter and three-year-old son spent more time with Joanie than they did with me.
Sawyer’s hand slides into mine, lacing her fingers with mine, and the small gesture feels really fucking big. “A lot of people who are heartbroken get lost in their work. Joey cheating on me and then signing over his rights to our daughter hurt like a bitch. I cried for weeks wondering why we weren’t enough for him. And then to push it away, I got lost in school.”
“How did we go from playing would you rather to something so deep?” I joke, not wanting the night to take a dark turn.
“We never started playing.” She laughs, and the sound has my insides knotting.
I pull up to the valet and exchange my keys and a tip for a ticket, and then we head inside. The restaurant is on the water, and I’ve requested outdoor seating. The hostess welcomes us and takes us to the table. Sawyer orders a dirty martini, and I order a Coke since I’m driving.
“I’d rather press a pause life button,” she says out of nowhere. It takes me a second to remember what I asked her for my would you rather question. “Life right now feels pretty damn good. I’m a college graduate. I have a job. This vacation has been the perfect mix of fun and relaxing. Abby’s met some new friends. I’ve met you.” Her eyes lock with mine. “It feels like for the first time I can finally breathe easy.”
“I completely understand what you mean.”
“So, is it my turn now?” she asks after the waiter has taken our order. “Do I get to ask you a question?”
“Yep.”
She taps her chin and looks up at the sky in mock concentration. “Okay, I got one.” The devilish smirk on her face has me thinking she’s about to ask me something crazy, and a few seconds later, she confirms my suspicions. “Would you rather get caught having sex by your kids or by your parents?”