‘It’s important work.’ It seemed as if the spark, which invigorated her and made everything she touched seem special, had suddenly gone.
‘I felt that getting justice for people mattered. I still do, but it was very hard emotionally. I couldn’t stop myself getting over-involved.’
‘I can understand...’ Matteo bit the words back. He knew all about being involved with his work, and could understand a wish for justice. But he wasn’t sure he understood these particular pressures, or how Rose must have felt.
* * *
Did he? Did he really understand? When she looked into his face, she saw only humanity, the gentle eyes of a healer. To understand some of the things she’d seen, someone would need to have a streak of evil in their heart.
‘No, you don’t understand. And, trust me, that’s a good thing, there are some things that decent people shouldn’t be able to make sense of.’
‘Can
you explain it to me, then?’
‘No. I really don’t think I can.’ Suddenly the air seemed cold, and Rose shivered, wanting to cover up her bare arms.
Why should Matteo be any different from her ex-husband? It was better not to say anything, so that she didn’t have to hear him dismiss her feelings.
Rose shot him a smile and he took the hint. ‘What was it you were going to show me?’
She almost wished he hadn’t given up so easily. As she showed him the newly excavated test pits and the areas of mosaic that they’d uncovered, he seemed to have left everything else behind, concentrating only on what was before his eyes.
But Rose couldn’t forget. Alec had been a lot like Matteo, easygoing and charming, and that was what had drawn her to him. He hadn’t wanted to know about the hard parts of life, or even its necessary practicalities, and Rose had dealt with them willingly, not wanting to spoil his almost shining aloofness from such things.
They’d set up home together, working on scraping the walls and rebuilding the ramshackle kitchen and bathroom in the house in Tufnell Park. And they’d been happy.
It had been Rose who couldn’t cope. When her work had become stressful, Alec hadn’t wanted her to spoil their evenings by talking about it. She’d stayed quiet, turning in on herself, and in the end they’d hardly communicated at all. Her pregnancy, so unexpected but so much wanted, had left her even more tired and that had been the last straw for Alec. He’d wanted the carefree life they’d had, and when Rose had destroyed it all he’d left without looking back.
Matteo was squatting down next to one of the pits, talking in Italian to the archaeology student who was digging there. He was obviously asking about the soil strata at the side of the pit because the student ran his finger along a darker layer that indicated a fire maybe three hundred years ago.
He’d been kind, and he seemed willing to be a friend. Her life was on course now, and anything else would be madness. She’d messed up once, and now that she had William to consider, she couldn’t afford to do it again.
Matteo got to his feet and walked over to stand beside her. ‘You’re doing some fascinating work here.’
‘I’ve saved the most interesting thing for last.’
His eyes hooded lazily in an almost explicit invitation. ‘I’m already captivated. What more can you do?’
Rose gulped, turned her back on him in case she was tempted to improvise an answer, and started to lead him away from the main excavations, along a dusty pathway. ‘This is another find we made by mistake. No one knew it was there...’
She was shaking, blushing furiously and playing the tour guide so she could banish unwanted thoughts. Rose saw a figure up ahead of them and quickened her pace to catch up, reckoning that there was a certain degree of security in numbers.
‘David...’ The middle-aged man turned as she called his name. ‘I’d like you to meet Dr Matteo Di Salvo...’
‘Dr Di Salvo.’ The two men shook hands. ‘What’s your speciality?’
Matteo grinned. ‘Medicine. Rose has been kind enough to show me around this evening.’
David laughed over his own mistake and the two men began to chat, moving quickly from the necessary preliminaries of the weather and the spectacular view up here to Matteo’s questions about the site. He was interested in everything. Rose breathed a sigh of relief, reminding herself that she was just a very small part of everything that Matteo’s quick mind seemed to thrive on.
They climbed a little, over rough, stony ground, and then reached the mouth of a cave. David handed Matteo a hard hat from a box, and chalked the number three, along with the time, on the blackboard that hung outside.
‘Our little safety precaution.’ David smiled at Matteo. ‘Just in case anyone meets with an accident.’
She saw Matteo’s eyebrow quirk downwards, but he said nothing. ‘We also let the main office know when we’re coming down here.’ Under the intensity of Matteo’s gaze, the blackboard seemed a very amateurish and uncertain precaution.
‘Oh...yes, of course.’ David smiled. ‘Must remember to do that next time. I dare say that someone will be down to rescue you two if we don’t emerge in one piece, and I’ll just tag along.’