Immediately, I was shaking my head.
“Allow me to have my secrets for a little bit longer, Wendy. Besides, it wasn’t exactly the best time.”
We were both busy. I could have offered to walk with her, but she did look like she was ready to run away from me when she first saw me. I didn’t doubt that, if I’d asked that, she would have turned me down flat. Alessandra had seemed a little tense at my presence, and while I wasn’t sure why, I knew this wasn’t something I could force, or try to move along quickly.
“Wouldn’t it be easier if you just told her everything, though?” Wendy questioned. “I mean, you act all tough, and you busy yourself with work, but I know how much you cared for her and I know you’re not over her.”
I snorted. “Of course I’m not over her. I’ve known her for nearly a decade, and we were together for about eight years. You can't just erase all that in fifteen months. At least, it’s not gone for me, but I don’t know about her. I can't just go up to her, say ‘Alessandra I’m still in love with you, can we get back together’ and hope for the best.”
Wendy rolled her eyes but didn’t argue.
I nearly did do it, though, I thought.
When I saw her at the park, a lot of things didn’t register at first. After convincing myself that she was really in front of me, what I wanted to do at that moment was run to her and pull her into my arms, ask where she’d been, why she had left me, and told her that I wanted her back.
Her eyes looked down, into the stroller she was pushing. Reality crashed on me, and it was chilling. It’d taken all I had to appear casual when I went up to her and spoke to her usually.
“I’m not going to be hasty,” I murmured. “I feel like if I push too much, she’ll run away again. I don’t know why she ran in the first place, and if I could figure that out first, it might be easier to fix this. But I plan to do this one step at a time. And you are going to help me, Wendy.”
I turned my gaze to her, and she narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously.
“What do you want from me? If you want me to be your little spy…”
“Nothing like that. I got her number, but she only gave it to me because I said you might need a nanny. So what I need from you, is to get busy, and try to align it with the days I’m not quite so busy.”
“And why exactly do I have to plan my life around you?” she questioned, incredulous.
“It’s not something that difficult. You don’t have someone to look after the kid when you have things you want to do, right? So you’ve been holding yourself back while you look for someone, but you wouldn’t trust strangers that easily. It doesn’t even have to be around my schedule. Just tell me when and I can handle things at work.”
It was a busy time, but I was already giving it my all. Besides, I was the boss. No one said I couldn’t delegate some of the work to other people to do.
After doing nothing but living and breathing work for the last year, I deserved some time to myself.
Wendy thought about it, but in the end, just sighed and shrugged. I knew that meant she agreed with me, and I grinned.
“Whatever. It’s good, I suppose. It’ll stop you from being miserable.”
I watched as she went back to paying attention to her son, cooing at him and tickling him to make him giggle. And I remembered Alessandra and the way that she looked into the stroller, maybe she was better with kids than I’d ever given her credit for. Maybe splitting up was good for us, and would make us stronger once we got back together. Maybe I was being hasty. Maybe she wouldn’t give me one last try.
Chapter Three
Alessandra
“Shh, baby boy,” I murmured. “Don’t cry; Mommy’s here.”
I was walking around my room at my parents’ house, holding Danny to my shoulder and rubbing his back gently. I’d just been woken by his crying, but he was thankfully calming down.
Now that I wasn’t in college, I had moved back in with my parents. I did have a small apartment away from home while I was still in school, but since I’d failed my exam, and considering I was alone and pregnant, I’d figured moving back home for the time being would be the best idea.
I had been apprehensive at first. I wasn’t sure how my parents would take it, but they had been lovely as usual and very supportive, I felt so lucky to have them on my side. They both had work, but for a while, Mom had taken a break from work to help me. It was in the later stages of my pregnancy when everything seemed to hurt and to move around was such a chore. She had been the one to get me to the hospital when I went into labor, and she called Dad who had arrived quickly.
The two, proud grandparents were utterly in love with their new grandson. They helped me out, but I was insistent on being his primary caretaker instead of bothering my parents, though I knew they didn’t mind being disturbed.
It hadn't been easy, and I was sure I would have lost my mind already if I hadn't had them.
“Are you okay now, baby? Are you hungry, hmm? Why don’t we go feed you?”
I carried him out of my room. I only had my bed there, and I liked being comfortable with this part. The house was empty, but I left with his blanket and w